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man I am f*cking sick of the mind games Roni plays with me. She's still with Jaxon, but if things don't work out with him she'd want me back, f*ck that. After that conversation we had on the phone and on the internet she f*cking goes and f*cks him anyways, even though he's cheating on her, and she might be pregnant, but you know I'm the f*cking bad guy out of all this. It's all my fault for the way I used to be, I hate how she pulls that bullsh1t on me every f*cking time. She's done way worse to me, everything I did she did at least twice to me, and yet somehow I'm the bad person it pisses me off. Even the emails I sent them forgiving them apparently was bad, because I told Jaxon that he isn't the man that was like a brother to me and I hope that he finds himself again, and that I told Roni she needs to respect herself more and not let herself be used just for sex, oh well f*ck it they're both gone for good out of my life now. I can't handle it anymore, I tried to be the f*cking nice guy to them and all I get is spit on and walked all over, I'm sick and tired of it. I hate the "I love you and I want to be with you, I miss being with you." bullsh1t she feeds me because she's still spreading her legs for him and being with him, she just wants to keep me on the side incase things don't work out, and she thinks that should be fine, considering I was a d1ck before. I myself don't think it's right at all, but then again she's an immature little b1tch, and I shouldn't have ever fallen for her, she's my biggest regret ever. I need to blow off some steam somehow because I'm really mad that she blames me for everything she's done. Maybe I'll make some phone calls see if anyone's up for something. I hate how whenever I start to feel better, she butts into my life and f*cks it up all over again.
-Jamie