I just got a drunken call from my x-boyfriend. And I answered. I don't know why I did... yes I do, I lied. I answered because I still care for him and I still want to be with him. I told him that I missed him, and he claims the same thing. How can he even think that after what he's put me through? I'm so confused by him right now. He consumes my every thought. He's all I've been able to think of, and yet he's the one person who has managed to break my heart while we were still together. God I'm screwed up. I don't know if I want to cry or tear his head off or just brush this whole thing off.
He said he's going to call me sometime this weekend. And I'm looking forward to it. A lot. I still want to be with him, but I can't. He broke my heart in a much more effective way than anyone else has managed. I shared my most personal secrets with him; we had a future planned together; I wanted to have kids with him!
At least now I know that perfection does not exist.
 vafalla · Thu May 31, 2007 @ 06:01am · 0 Comments |
