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Game Rant: Warhammer Age of Reckoning |
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Waaaaaargh! That was the obscene sound I was hearing for the past year. You know, I thought this game was going to be quite fun. Hell, I quit Warcraft for it. Now dont get me wrong. It's a good game and all, but really... If you're on Warcrack, dont downgrade yourself to mild doses of ritalin.
First off!
Graphics: Pretty much the same as WoW. Trees are trees, rocks are rocks, ground is ground. Delving deeper, though, Warhammer is slightly lacking in the effects department. In WoW, when you see a mage casting Fireball, everyone in the whole damn area sees it and runs. In Warhammer, you dont have a clue if he's healing, casting fireball, or just doing /special. All the effects are generally look the same. From heals, to curses, to fireballs. I dont know if thats a good thing or not, that Warhammer decided to hide it's spells, but it gets sort of monotonous. It'd be like a movie using the same explosion effect for everything. He blows up his car! BOOM! He fires his gun! BOOM! He opens up his wallet and pulls out a $20! BOOOOOM!
You get the picture
Gameplay: What Warhammer really is, is just WoW PVP rebalanced. Sure, the PVP is balanced, but it's so lacking in PVE that there's almost no other way to level, other than killing someone else on the battlefield. Thats all fine and dandy if there were more people ON the battlefield. And after playing the same battle map 7 times in a row, only to gain 1 level, you kinda wanna sit down, take a long hard look at your life, and play something more exciting like Minesweeper. At least Minesweeper holds more surprises.
Not to mention that for some reason Warhammer decided to add seige weapons. So now, the first person that can make it to a Catapult or a Ballista wins the match.
Sound/Music: Huh? Whats that? I cant hear you over the boring drone of plucked out strings and horns. At least in WoW, when you entered some awe inspiring music, it'd PLAY some awe inspiring music. Really folks, I cant, for the life of me, recall Warhammer's musical score. That about sums it up.
Balance: This is the only thing going good for WAR. PVP is balanced. So Balanced in fact, that it's rock, Paper, scissors. Rock beats scissors, no questions asked. Scissors have no way of fighting back. They might as well stab themsevles in the face and call it a day. Really, the way the game works is Good Rock chases evil Scissors before evil Scissors can kill Good Paper, while evil paper tries to kill Good Rock before it can utterly destroy scissors. So they might as well all run in circles spanking each other, cause thats really what it looks like.
In a lame attempt, WAR added capture the flag, Capture the post, Capture the ball, Capture the man, Capture the Pokemon, and all that great capture stuff. All in all, you run in circles, slapping each other, all while slowly migrating to some capture point. At that moment, you circle the capture point, slapping each other silly till the times up.
Also, with Balance, once you reach max level, whatever class you become, becomes a lawnmower. Everyone else then becomes grass (Or small grasshoppers that jump out of the way.) Now that might be all fun and whatnot, but think about it.... Do you mow grass for fun? Do you like pushing a heavy piece of metal around? Do you PAY people so you can mow THEIR lawn? Then this is the game for you!
Customization: What can I say? WoW and WAR are the same thing. The only thing WAR has over WoW, is that in WAR, you can color your armor in primary colors. Primary colors like... "Baby Puke Green", "Intestinal Distress Brown", and the ever popular "Tooth Decay Yellow." Yes, ladies and gentlemen, you, too can look like some horrible rotting corpse. Whats that you say? You want better colors? Why yes, we have better colors like "Clotted Blood Red", and "Chunky Pea Soup Green" But rather than cost 10 silver like the other colors, these can reach up to 50 gold. Much more than what most people are willing to spend. Did I mention "Ruptured Vein Purple"?
Atmosphere: Well, here in WAR, you get to see the magestic mountains... The Magestic Plagued Mountains. The Rolling Plains, the Rolling Plagued Plains... You get the picture. You got yourself the beach, the mountains, and the plains. Nothing much else. You dont get any more diverse than that. All other MMOs Ive played, you see Crystal Towers, raging waterfalls, and lost, underwater temples. Psh. Who needs that when you can stand in the middle of a field and see EVERYTHING. Miles and miles of nothing.
I cant even think of a quirky closing for this rant. WAR was a good break from WoW, but it made me realize how much I enjoyed just about every other MMO out there that has people on it. Did I mention the servers are barren? Only thing that has life in it is the starting area, where bots with the names "4dfgdfbfdssg" Spam you with "Deals" on WoW gold. Yes, the bots come onto WAR, and spam WoW gold. That says something right there.
 Diana Crowe · Fri Jan 09, 2009 @ 06:43pm · 0 Comments |
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