Okay... lets see wat i can write here. Well first, im really loseing my mind not that i already lost it but yeah... i cant figure out who i am. I cant stand it. Yesturday was the first day of skool. I was happy cuz i got to see all my pals. But... i dont kno anymore. I... i dont kno how i feel towards them anymore. Yeah sure there my buddies but i cant feel that. Its annoying. I think im just putting a fake fasade so that they can only think im alright and all. oh well... its not like i have anything to care about. Since my bro moved out i have been very distant and in my imagnary world. I have seriouse problems. I cant seem to comprehend the s**t that i think about half the time... more like the morjaty of the time. I cant seem to figure out anything that would be important in life. I am a complex mess and always will be. ******** i need to get a life. I Understand some of my friends probs like my one friend Camel she never had a boy friend. I understand its aggravating. But everyone proably has found them selves as for i.... well myself i dont kno. Its hard to think about it cuz i dont kno nothing about myself. Nothing to the fact that i dont care Litterally i dont not care. Like sure my dad was tooken to the hospital some time last month in a ambulance and i was freaking out who wouldnt. But 3 days later, my mum askes me if im worried i said stright out in a harsh tone "hell no." Im heartless. And i use ppl with out meaning too. Im a ******** loner. I cant stand ******** life its a major pain in my a**. No matter how much i want to kill someone i dont. Its ******** gay. What hell am i babbaling about now? Goddamnit i make no ******** sence. This is nothing but a pain! Couples make my vomit. Tight Friends ships make me gag. Being close to someone point blank i want to jab out my own ******** eyes. Its a pain. I swear i need help. i need help... BEing alone sucks a**....
OH wat else yeah i dont kno if i like guys i dont even kno if i like chicks im uncertin about it all. ******** been stuck in the house for 2 complete weeks really ******** up my brains. And im fed up of seen Erics face. Im am tired of ppl been all concered for me. I tired of it all. Its a PAin. cant everyone just roll over and die or something.
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Lilith's wacked out days & scary thoughts
My Journal, My place, My thoughts.
IM strange I live in a strange envermant i have wacked out friends... and i write strange things....
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Blood_thirsty
Community Member |
Death is the king of the world; tis his park where he breds life to feed him. Cries of pain are music for his banquet
User Comments: [1] [add]
User Comments: [1] [add]
Community Member
Don't think you are the only one who hasn't found who they are. Sometimes, you feel as if you are te only person in the world. No one cares about you and stuff. I have felt like that this summer because of numerous problems. Heck, I changed so much since then... You might be the only person in this world, but you might mean the world to one person. Lilith..I knew something was wrong...Yeah,we joked and all...But something didn't click together. Don't think pervertedly cuz this isn't the perverted...its serious. You need some time to think and relax...Look...I know I am well concerned...But darn, I think i have a point. I am a very caring person when I see my friends are down and depressed...I'm here for you in a friend way...We're pals. Isn't that what pals do? Help each other in their time of need?