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Im there again, starting to think whats the point. I have nothing to live for.
Im just here, not doing anything. Not going anywhere. I have all these feelings, and no body cares. I dont think any one will ever see me for anything but a friend. I'll never get passed it. I'll die lonely, probly at some point will shoot myself in the head cus Im too much a p***y to cut my own wrist. and I think whats the point. I dont think there is one anymore. Yeah I want to quit to check out.

Ive tryed over and over again, but so far no body no bodywants me. I even get dissed my fat chicks and ugly chicks. Even when i think I meet someone who dosent go by whats out side but whats on the inside Im still pushed over for someone better looking.

I think maybe I'll go to a gym lose my fat get myself looking good, then what get some chick and be nice to here, nope that wont work chicks these days want the good looking guy who will treat them like s**t, and they will beg for more. Nice guys dont finish last these days they just dont finish at all, most of them take there life before they reach the finish line, why? becuase we never see the finish line no matter how far we run theres always a brick wall in our way.

I really cant seem to think of a reson worth living oh my family, my friends? even them its hard to try for. I want something more then just that, but I know I will never find something more. Im not worth it to anyone to be more then just a friend. Yeah there all missing out but thats not saying s**t for them cus the one whos missing out the most is me. Im never going to be someones boyfriend, or someones husband Im never going to be a father, or someones grandfather why? Because no one wants to see me as anything but a friend.

Im sick of it. Im sick of trying. Im just done. I cant see a reson anymore to hold on. No one wants to give me a reson yeah Im a whinny b***h so ******** what, you know its all the people who get what they want or have what ever they want or who ever who say s**t like that, they dont know what its like to be the most un-wanted person in the world.

I dont know when but if things dont start to change for me at some point I dont think I can hold on to this life anymore.