Oh god, I've been going through hell the last few weeks. Every since school started back, I've been busy since day one. Yeah, I understand that since I ******** up my high school life by failing so much, I've destroyed any chance of having a decent Senior year, but even for that there's just too much to do... Mainly it's because I have one teacher I just can't stand and then there's the AP class I signed up for... Who does that their Senior year? The stupid, that's who.
Then there's the endless, epic battle between my parents and Olson, the principal, over my phone. Sometimes, I wish I wasn't addicted to it... Anyways, my phone went off in school cause the keyguard setting on the front wasn't doing it's job (it was a Gaia Alert too!) so I was sent to Dr. Johnson's office, she's an administrator, who then sent me to Olson to verify some medical information as to why my phone was necessary. Anyways, again, she failed to remember there was a letter from my doctors from last year, then proceeded to say it was last year's letter, AND THEN deny that it was ever approved... I don't know if that's just hate for me and my family or she really did forget...
And my home life is no better at the moment, the nephews and neices coming over EVERY DAY is quite the burden...and of course I'm too tired to actually finish a piece of artwork. Then there's the constant bickering between me and my dad...and all over nothing but silly stuff...and most of the time it's just me not being able to handle the situation maturely...
I've had plenty of people tell me it's all good, it's gonna turn out okay, it'll get better when the day's over...
but the day is over and I'm still feeling foolish and stupid and useless.
I don't know what to do anymore, I can't handle anything at all. I don't know how to handle my emotions either and it's hurting a lot of people... even myself.
It's times like these I just wish I could run away and disappear, so that I'm not a burden to others or myself anymore. It's times like these I wish I were a better person. It's times like these I wish I was never born.
But that doesn't solve anything and I'm stuck right back at the beginning. What to do...?
 Butterfly_Ruins005 · Tue Sep 22, 2009 @ 03:19am · 0 Comments |
