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Why am I even writing this? I have no idea. It's not like anyone's ever going to actually read this, right? (Or maybe that's why I'm doing it. I don't know.) (But it's not like I have anywhere else to go anymore...)

But that's really the big question right now, isn't it? Why? Why am I doing anything? What's the point of it all? No matter what I do, I just keep getting more and more depressed, and I don't see any way out of it. Anything that's ever really helped has never been anything I've had any control over, and anyone who might have control over it... well, I don't know what's going on there. But I suppose that's what I get for allowing anything to become important to me; the universe has that nasty habit of denying me those things. You'd think I'd've learned that lesson by now: don't hope, because it only leads to disappointment. Yet here I am, trying to hold out hope again. Why? Why do I even bother? I don't know. I just don't know. Not that there's any alternative, though. *Sigh*

Am I rambling? Probably. I do that. But, again, it's not like anyone's actually going to read any of this, so I suppose it doesn't matter. (Just like everything else in my life. Fitting, that.) Maybe typing all this out will make me feel better. I doubt it, but one never knows.