15. Please, God
The time for me to e-mail them draws near. I don’t see it as me shutting them out of my life, but them shutting everyone else out of their lives. I still want to be part of their life even after everything they have put me through. I don’t know what to do… I wish I could talk to Robert again… I miss him so much. God, please watch over Robert for me in my absence. Give him strength when I cannot, give him courage to see everything through, give him wisdom to separate the truth from the lies, give him hope to march on through my father’s tyranny and dreams that he may reach for with both hands. Please grant him everything that I could and can not give him at this time or in my life. Please send him all the warm and love my earthly father denies me of doing, and hold him tightly in your arms and let him sleep peacefully under your watch. Please watch him grow into a wonderful young man for me, as my eyes cannot reach his face no more. Please hold and keep him as long as he believes in you and your teachings and that Jesus died for him on the cross… Please give him everything I cannot, all the love, warmth, affection, protection, wisdom, riches, stories, hopes, dreams, courage, strength he deserves…
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