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03. b*****d.

It’s just a little bit after midnight, so it’s technically still 10/17 for me, but who cares right? The ******** a*****e won’t let me into school, and now he decided he won’t send me my stuff until I’m 18. Would you like some wine with that bullshit? Of course mike’s eating it all up like a little puppy, and I can only imagine what they’re telling Robert. Augh!

Oh yeah, here are my choices as of today:

- Go home for six months so that “my parents can watch me grow up in their own provided environment and make sure that I’ll be okay and make something of myself”
Translation: “my masters can have me under surveillance as I grow up in their own provided prison environment and make sure that I’m as miserable as can be and make sure that I provide them for the rest of my life.

OR

- Stay here, they won’t send my stuff back until I’m 18 and they won’t sign anything to let me back into school. AUGH! I felt like I wanted to die today, and realized that I do need mental treatment. There’s something wrong with me, but I don’t know what it is or where or what it stems from specifically though. Hopefully I’ll be able to get in one way or another. ‘Cause you know what? I’d really rather not go to school then back to that forsaken hell hole he calls a home.

I love mom and dad, but I don’t love what they’ve done to me, I don’t appreciate what they’ve put me through though I appreciate what they’ve done for me, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to go back crawling on my kneels just so he can win his ******** little mind game.

I’d rather die then let that b*****d win.

See what I mean? I’m messed up in the head… I’d probably kill someone over a pretzel right now too, so it might just be all the anger. I seriously want to hurt something though. At least I don’t have to go to school? There’s a bright spot amongst the darkness.

Also, it kind of ticks me off that Niota never calls. It wouldn’t kill her, would it? After Mr. Uden calls us I’m going to report it here in this journal… So… yeah. XD