June 7th, 2018
I had a dream last night. I had broken up with my boyfriend and was talking to Mike through text on Skype and suddenly I had sent the message I've been most anxious about: I'm crazy about you.
M: "I like you too."
He said it back. He said he likes me too and he went on to say he had for a while.
You do?
M: Yea, I have for a long while but I kept it quiet because of.. well, you know.
At this point my heart is in my throat, beating faster than I can ever remember. My stomach is full of butterflies and I'm happier than I can ever remember being. But there's still the matter of distance, me being in Canada, him being in the US of A so we start making plans. We think of how long it'll be before we can get together and long much time we can steal and I'm happy.
But then the dream ends.
I've never been so devastated to wake up. My dream world was so much better and I was happy. But I know it's bad to feel this way. Tonight's the night. I have to do it. I have to break up with my boyfriend, it's not fair to him and putting it off is causing my anxiety to go through the roof. It'll hurt, 5 years is a long time to be together, but I can't keep living like this. I have to start the next chapter of my life and unfortunately for him, he doesn't make an appearance as a partner. It's time.
Girl_in_love61636 Community Member 
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