I had to deal with a lot of hurt today and a lot of growth and it's all so terribly complicated that I just don't have the energy to type it all down.
But in short whether they realize it or not my supervisors are teaching me how to be a supervisor, how to dance the tricky dance of communication and how to speak up for what's right even though it's hard. I have to have a heart to heart with them and soon and it's scary but this is what I was meant to do in order to get better.
I got advice I would have given myself from a friend and coworker and the experience was profound and honestly I feel like she got help by giving me advice and knowing that she's not the only one who's suffering.
Just a bit ago I got a memory of my dad at the park with my brother and my dad got on this spinning thing that makes you dizzy. He jumped on it and spun around until he fell right off landing on his back. He laughed SO loud and hard I good see inside his toothless mouth. I want to remember that.
Susurrations Community Member 
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