So the past month I have had a rocky friendship with someone who I care deeply for. They have put me into a position i feel both like I am valued as dirt and that i am bullied. I know that this is unintentional. I am aware she does not treat me badly on purpose. I know that She is a good person with a kind heart. I know She is a sweet and loving girl. I know this.
I know that I care for her deeply and I wish her the very best. I hope she gets all the things her heart desires and I hope that she excels in her art. I hope she makes lots of friends who she loves and cares for and I hope her and her boyfriend get married. I love her and I will miss her terribly.
Now.. Even though I know the pain she has caused me was all an accident it does not excuse the fact that I am a human too, and I should not have to put up with the emotional stress I have been putting up with. I have been walked on and I don't care that it was an accident. I can only put up with things for so long before I get tired and give up. A Friendship is suppose to be a two person dance. When only one person is dancing it isn't fair anymore. I do not want to feel like I am as good as dirt. I do not want to feel like I am worthless to someone who is worth more than the world to me. That is not fair.
I wish I could have fixed things. I wish I could have worked with her to make it work but she had very little interest in making it work and I got tired.
So to my dear friend whom I love. I miss you. I am sorry I was weak. I am sorry I couldn't make it work. I wish we could have been the way we were when we first became friends. It was so much fun having someone to talk to.
I am only one man, I can only put up with so much. You wore my kindness thin, even though you never meant to. I do not blame you. I love you.
All good things come to an end. Thank you for being my friend.
That's all. Until Later
-Lue
Lucifer Knightroad · Fri Jul 14, 2017 @ 08:30am · 0 Comments |