Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

So today, I woke at the end of an extraordinary dream! And I did remember all of it, but I figured I would forget it while typing, because I don't type as fast as I think. I then decided to make a recording of me reciting my dream the best I could. Smart, eh? 4laugh But while I was recording myself, my mom told me to wake up. I was already awake, of course. I was in bed. So after she left, I continued the recording, and I forgot the ending of the dream. sweatdrop

So I'm sorry if you can't follow along. As you probably know, dreams are often inconsistent in regards to their storylines.. confused

Okay. So I don't know how I'm going to approach this, as this is my first official dream log. I'm a bit excited, to be honest. It's not the awesomest dream ever, but I remember most of it, which is awesome. mrgreen

Truth is, I've had tons of dreams I did remember. I couldn't tell them to you because they were a bit.. let's say, mature? cool

It started at night. My siblings and I were playing in a theater room. My oldest brother and I sat in the audience. We were the only audience, watching my five other siblings pretend to perform something.

In reality, I have three siblings. However, in this scene of my dream, I had an extra three.

I felt the sudden urge to sneeze. I took out a tissue which I conveniently had in my pocket, and, well, sneezed. Where was the garbage again? I looked around. The theater room had it's lights turned off, all the lights, that is, except the stage lights. And on the very back corner of the stage sat a lonesome garbage bin. Could I make it if I threw my used tissue? One way to find out.

I threw my tissue, aiming at the garbage can, and I missed. Actually, while I was throwing it, my second brother (the youngest-but-older-than-me one) was singing a note. The crumpled tissue landed in his mouth.

First off, yeah, I know it's gross. In the dream, it didn't seem gross though. Also, like in my dream, I do actually have terrible accuracy when it comes to aiming. Another note, my second brother does not sing in public. I know he sings, so that must be why he was singing in my dream.

He got pissed off. I mean, who wouldn't? I, on the other hand, was laughing. I couldn't help it. My second brother then threw the tissue, which was now bewitched or something that it couldn't hit the desired target. My brother hit my sister first, before the tissue bounced off and hit my other siblings on stage, and lastly flinging into my oldest brother's mouth. His mouth just happened to be open because he, too, was laughing.

Here, my brother was hit by me, and he hit the four other stage performers, and my other brother. In reality, three of the stage performers did not exist. To this very moment, I'm bothered by how my subconscious believes I have more family members than I actually do. It's a bit scary, don't you think? That my brain put unreal people into my life in the dream? These additional stage performers, the ones that do not exist in reality, have no background information. In my dream, the stage lights were bright enough to fade the details of these people, so I can't even describe them.

My oldest brother took the tissue out of his mouth. He was so mad. He didn't say a word to me. My siblings and I headed home.

Now, in reality, I do have a home, a nice home at that. In my dream, my home was shaped like a hotel, and my siblings and I slept in one hotel room. The hotel room in my dream was pretty big though, so I didn't realize I wasn't at my house until I woke up and thought, "Hey, wait. That wasn't my house, but a hotel room.."

Here we were, in our room we shared, the four of us.

Now, I don't know why, but when this scene came, my family numbers were back to normal.

My oldest brother, whose name is Savio, said to me, "I'm so pissed right now. I feel like killing you."

I, who knew how mad he was, and who knew his madness was my fault, felt, well, guilty. I said to him, "If it makes you feel any better, go ahead."

The room had two beds, both king-sized. It had one window on the west-wall. It was also furnished with a TV on a shelf, and a giant fan.

It must have been a spur of the moment kind of thing, but my siblings and I started playing hide-and-seek. The room, having not much to hide in, was pretty boring, and I was found in no time.

"Can I kill you now?" Savio said to me, obviously still pissed.

"Go ahead," I said, still bearing the guilt. I, myself, thought I should die because used tissues are, um, gross. Having one in your mouth, especially one that has been in another's mouth, would be worse.

Savio turned the fan sideways, and he switched it on. In reality, this would make it so that the wind from the fan would be directed upwards. In my dream, air was being pushed out sideways. Savio opened the fan covering to make it so that the fan blades were exposed, and dangerous. He then lifted me, and threw me into the [insert a poetic term for "blades of the fan"].

Now, I was not scared of dying, because I did feel as if I needed to die. Another thing, it all happened so quickly that I didn't feel it.

In reality, you do not know when you'll die. In reality, death IS to be feared. In reality, death DOES hurt.

"Hm, that's weird," I said following my death.

My siblings, who were now cleaning my blood that has been sprayed everywhere, looked at me. Or at least, they tried to.

"Lucia?" one of my siblings said. After a bit of discussion, I found out they could hear me.

So, I'll try to explain this simply, but I apologize if this sounds to bizarre to even hope people would understand. Because I didn't fear death, and because I knew I was going to die, death did not affect me the way it should. Because my death happened to fast, I didn't feel it. Since I didn't feel it, it means I didn't feel death. My soul, then, believed I was alive. My soul continued living because it believed it was alive, since it didn't feel death. My body, on the other hand, is long gone, now smeared across the room.

My soul was strong enough, and convinced enough, to be able to talk and interact with objects. My body, which contained my image, was gone. I was, basically, invisible. I was dead, but alive.

It's a bit confusing, I know. My guess is that this factor of my dream is based off a theory I'm developing, stating that reality is a figment of imagination. Matter is made up of strings of thought, not energy. One who can think is able. One will be able to control, to create, to understand, to anything. All one needs is thought. I'll go in further detail in another entry.

So I helped clean up, and my siblings and I went to bed.

The next morning, still in the dream, I went to school with my teddy bear. I had to have my teddy bear so that people can know where I was. To others, I appeared as a floating, yellow, worn teddy.

The bear in my dream is, in fact, an actual teddy bear. It's my teddy bear, named Teddy, that I got when I was five. My uncle had given it to me, and I cherish it a lot.

After having explained my situation to everyone, life was back to normal. The last period of the school day was P.E, or physical education.

This is funny. I didn't notice until now, but I shouldn't have participated in gym class. Physical education without a physical body? Ha! rofl

We were playing volley ball. We were practicing our sets and bumps. In my dream, sets and bumps were called chickens and crows. The terms "set" and "bump" did not exist in my fantasy world.

When gym was over, I felt this odd, almost "lifting" force on me. I knew, then, that I was being called up.. to the heavens, possibly? I wanted to confess to the one I liked, and to tell him goodbye. However, I noticed my wrestling team gather for a group photo. Turns out, they looked for me, but couldn't find me since I was invisible. Good thing my friend, Federica, noticed my floating teddy bear and called me over.

First off, Federica is my friend in reality. She and I are pretty close. We help each other in school work, and we often join the same sports teams. However, in reality, Federica did not join wrestling no matter how much I begged! She claims it's scary. Federica, if you're reading this, I'll tell you right now, it's not scary! The workouts hurt, but it's a good hurt. 3nodding

I was seated next to Federica and a student from another grade. I told the student, "Don't be afraid." She replied, "I'm won't be." Then she let out the most genuine smile ever. A picture was taken. It's weird how I was dead, but being treated alive.

Speaking of such circumstances, it remind me of "Another." It's this manga, which was later made into an anime. It's a horror story, but I really like it. The storyline is confusing, but once you get it, it becomes gold.

My coach then said, after the picture was taken, "Where's Clemenzia?"

Now, I do have a friend named Clemenzia. She's the sweetest thing! But no, she did not join wrestling in reality. cry

"Federica? I thought I told you to get her!" My couch said. In my dream, my coach did not have a defined gender, voice, or appearance. In reality, he's a dude though.

"Oh! I forgot!" Federica said.

Turns out, Federica was sent on an errand, but somehow, Clemenzia ended up doing it. Federica said she would go find her, but I insisted on going instead.

I was like, okay. I will go out, find Clemenzia, come back, and then confess and goodbye to my crush.

I set out.

In my dream, my school was encircled by this train track. The train track had no start, no finish. It had one train, a few cars long, that would continuously go around the track. The track was long, but short enough to loop a few times in one hour. I mean, you could start walking alongside the tracks, and you would be able to make quite a few laps per hour.

I set off to find Clemenzia, a teddy bear in hand. I found her eventually, and we headed back to school. I told her about how I wanted to say bye to someone, and we hurried. A few blocks away from school, I noticed I didn't have my teddy bear. My teddy bear not only let others know where I was, but it was also a precious belonging of mine.

Why didn't Clemenzia tell me? How did she know where I was without my teddy bear? Turns out, she listened to my voice. She was leading, and she never turned around. There was no need to since if she heard my voice, it meant I was there.

"We have to go back and get it," I said.

"But what about him ?"

"Forget him. I need my teddy bear."

So we go back, tracing our footsteps. I noticed on the way backwards that there were a lot of pebbles. I had to check between, under, and on top of rocks in attempts to find my bear. I found, instead, a pile of coins. I picked up the penny, as those have the most importance to me, and said to the copper coin, "Please, let me find my bear."

I threw it into the river. Oh, and btw, there was a river. A lot of the train track ran alongside a bridge by a river.

In reality, my school is close to a river. I walk there at lunch every so often. There is a bridge, and once upon a time, there were train tracks. The train tracks were removed though. Now, all that's left are the metal rods that run across the bridge.

The coin landed in the water, as I wanted. I was happy, because in my dreams, when you throw a penny that you've wished on, and it lands in water, that wish is bound to come true.

After checking the pebble area, we continue. On the other side of the river, I saw my uncle and my mom's friend's husband.

This uncle was not the uncle that gave me the bear. I have, about, 12 uncles? So, yeah.

"What are you doing out here?" they asked.

"Looking for my bear. If you see it, can you tell me?"

"Sure."

Now that I'm awake, I realized that they couldn't see me. Were they talking to my friend then? Idk.

Also, I forgot to add, I can see myself. Because my soul thinks I'm alive, it also thinks I have a body. If I raise my hands to my face, I will see my hands. No one other than me can see me.

So Clemenzia and I continue on our journey to find my bear. We end up in this room. The room had three futons, and a fireplace. It had an outlet by one of the futons. The outlet was occupied by several plugs, and among the plugs, I found my sharpener. Turns out, on my way to find Clemenzia, I had a sharpener, a pencil sharpener, with me. If the sharpener was in this room, my bear must be also!

Oh yeah. I forgot to tell you. I found Clemenzia by a house along the train tracks. Although it didn't occur to me then, but at the scene I described in the previous paragraph, I was most probably in this house.

The room I was in was connected to a kitchen. In the kitchen stood a man and his wife, who were there all along. They were nice people. Strangers, none the less.

"Are you looking for something?" they said politely.

"Yes, my teddy bear."

"Oh. We'll help look."

The couple was old. Their faces, wrinkled. They were nice people, though. Something about them was a bit strange.

After a really long time of looking through their house, the wife said, "Is this it?"

She held up a knitted yellow bear. It was flat. Its eyes and nose were knitted also, except with black yarn. It had a black shirt, also knitted.

"Yes!" I said. "Oh thank god!"

"A bear?" the man said. "I saw a yellow bear. I put him in the fridge to keep him fresh."

In my dream, this was a norm. It wasn't strange to put a stuffed animal into the fridge. It was, however, slightly offensive to me.

The man opened the fridge and took out my teddy bear. I held the two bears in my hands. They looked alike at first.

And then, something really strange happened to me. I have these memories of two yellow bears. I would find the two of them always in different places. I didn't move them. They moved on their own, was what I believed. But there was two. I only had one. I knew one of them was fake. One was evil, and it tried to harm me. The other was the real one, my friend, who played with my and made me happy. I have this memory of getting them in the same place, and seeing that the two bear, the fake and the real one, were exactly the same. There was no way to differentiate the two.


It took a while when I noticed something was wrong. The knitted bear? Evil. I didn't know it. It knew me. My teddy bear was hurt that I mixed it up with the evil bear. I was overwhelmed. The evil bear in my childhood memories? It was this bear. Now, I'm old enough to tell the difference. I took my real teddy bear, and I bid farewell to the aged couple, and left with Clemenzia.

This evil bear? I don't know if it exists in reality. Everyone said I dreamed it, but no. I know somewhere, he's hiding in the real world. Maybe he's moved on to another child. To haunt and taunt another child. And one day, that child will know what I know.

We headed back to school. The time was 3:75pm. Now, in my dream, I remarked at how we were away from school for about two hours. However, the time 3:75pm does not exist in reality. My best guess is that it was 4:15pm, which would explain my remark of it being nearly two hours.

Point is, it took a long time to find Clemenzia, go back for my teddy, and head to school. The wrestling team was probably no longer waiting for us, and the guy I liked probably went home already.




That's all I can remember. I knew it ended with a proper ending, but the second my mom told me to wake up, I forgot it all. I have the recording, but it only goes up to where my mom talked to me. I had to stop the recording to respond to her, and then I forgot my dream.

So yeah. Thanks for reading. Really, if you read all this, you're awesome! whee I bid my farewell, as I have stuff to do. Bye byes~!