UPDATED FOR MORE EYEGASMS :U
Agon’s Characters
Zack- “a*****e RIVAL!” ”Augh... Speedy, use a little more tact, will ya... also, actually describe the guy.” ”Er... okay. He’s pretty... glamorous, I guess, and he’s a pyromancer rockstar on tour whose a** I need to kick! Rival!””Augh, this is useless. We’re not gonna get a good response from this guy.””Um... I... I think Zack is... pretty cool... and... he’s a good... friend... and stuff... and he doesn’t seem... to like Bieber...”-nudges- “Stop talking like you’ve got a school girl crush, Hangman.” -cringes-
Blender(Zeta)-”BLENDER!””... are you going to do that this whole commentary? Because if that’s the case we should stop. As in, right now.”-sighs-“Fine. The guy’s some weird technicolored robo tranny obsessed with making the world kawaii!””It’s disgusting. He chases you around singing like a fusion of Kanye West and a robotic singing girl and asking you to bow to the empress! And he won’t stop calling me Delta either! The hell?!””Then he likes to have sex with you and calls it magical love love. It feels really cold...”-shivers-”...””That’s nasty...”
Zippy-”LAVA BAST-“-hit wit a shovel-”Goddamn lava golem! Leave Lulzy alone! Cant you get it through your thick skull that she doesn’t want to have sex with you?!”-sighs- “Forget it, Adam. As long as it’s a woman, Zippy’ll go after her like the perverted b*****d he is...””I did hear though he got a girlfriend recently.””...hell no.”
Lucian-”Ugh, another one. Can’t believe everyone’s after Lulzy like that, it’s cruel! So what if she’s a demon? Stop trying to lance her you stupid white knight!”-nods- “Thing is, the guy’s as sturdy as my home made cupcakes. He’s tough, and if it weren’t for the others helping us out that night, we’d have been ********- “I’m just happy I haven’t seen him in a while.”
Blackthorne-”She can be such a b***h!” -pats his back- “Some of your exes are, buddy.””She was never my girlfriend Darren. I just said she was a really good aeromancer, but she started going berserk on Bonnie and stuff cause I went for her instead of her. Stupid, stupid b***h!””Calm down, Speedy. She’s not that bad. Just watch for her temper and you’ll be fine, I guess.” “That is if you aren’t a woman.”
Novena- -blinks- “I don’t understand her, to be honest.”-nods- I think I remember her from your dome days, but-“”She was working with Lucian when I saw her.”-nods- “I think I remember that. Adam, you and I tried to attack her, but she got away. Then I had to catch her one time cause she attacked Zack. I’m not liking the thought of her very much...”
KILLKILLKILL (Gargaroth)-”Ah, my pet troll!””... the hell, Siege. That’s your pet? I mean, you always struck me as the Cockatoo type.” ”Haha, very funny, elf. I’m just saying that the troll is my pet. Incredibly big and muscular... and pretty stupid, he’s probably the only one in the unkawaii I can really tolerate. Even if all he can say is “KILL” or “GWAR!” .””... so what do you feed him? Boogers or something?”
That drunk dude from the park (Blaine) -”Drunk dude from the park! I remember him. He was pretty high. Smelled like crap too. A total bum. Even worse than me. He even fell from the sky in his cowboy hat and guns cause someone lit him. Good times. Good times.”
Alice Altair-”One of Zack’s crew. Silver hair, black dress and umbrella. Nice shades too. You know, I kinda think she seems like the brainy type, the type to kick Zack’s a** when he’s too out of line. The type to-“”That’s elemental bias, Speedy. Just cause she’s an aeromancer? Anyway, Speedy does have a point on the brainier type thing, and she’s also one of the friendlier ones. She tried to help me and Nyu out when we had that incident with the snake, so I guess I kind of like her.”
Simon- ”Tastes like chicken.”
Tako-”Ahh... the flying Tako. Honestly, who the hell gave a giant octopus a freaking Jet pack, cause I want one!”-shivers-”You alright?”-shakes head- “Never... try to lasso... the Tako...”
Claire--smiles- “I... never got her... name... but she helped... me fight... Zippy... I’m glad... to meet... someone... like her...””Kid! How many crushes have you got?”-frowns- “She’s not... but she’s... a friend... scary though... cause of blue fire... and scythe...””Don’t be so scared of her, Hangman. Like you said, she helped you out, and just the other day she helped me save Lulzy’s a** from ******** Cake. I’m sure she’s a decent person.”
Bonnie's Characters
Bubblehead(Bonnie)- ”She’s taken guys, hands off!””Alright, alright, I get it. Geeze, Speedy. I hit on her once and you start rampaging. I told you I’d lay off her.””I was talking about Tracer, but yeah, you too Darren.””Hey guys, at least give an intro to the girl. She’s the resident city aquamancer.””Kind of on the ditzy side if you ask me, but if you look at her boyfriend...””Darren, shut up. She may be kind of absent minded, but she’s also really sweet and kind and cute and-“-coughs- “You. Both of you. Stop spazzing out. This is not how you give a commentary.””I LOVE YOU BONNIE!”
Airi- ”She’s... Bub- Bonnie’s cousin.” “Yeah, and she seem kind of like an airhead... but a serious airhead.””I don’t think she was an air head, she was pretty particular with her weapons’ maintenance. Anyone who has that kind of look at their weapons is sharp.””She’s kinda creepy... kinda. Like when she tried to blood magic Zoe.” “I’ll admit she seems a little more intimidating than Bub- Bonnie. Not in a bad way though.”
Gypsy Girl(Piper)-”Gyspy girl~””Don’t know much about her, only that she got pretty pissed at me and Nyu for running around the place and being noisy.””That was just cause you were annoying. She seemed like a pretty nice woman. She helped Starboy find his sister and she wanted them to stay here and got pissed when I made it sound like a bad place.””That’s ni-“”She even helped me teach the guy about sex.””... what?”
Nerene-”Well... Nerene is... kind of... a kid... kind of.”-blinks- “Dunno, Pretz, she definitely doesn’t look like a kid. I mean, damn... she’s pretty hot.””Darren! She’s a water spirit for one, for another, she acts like a freaking kid! Don’t tap that!”-blinks- “... hey, she’s legal, right?””DARREN!””Alright, alright... she hangs out with Bubbly too much anyway, so I couldn’t go near her if I wanted to.”
SL's Characters
Lulzy- ”Heh... funny how we started out.””Dawww... so sweet. You and Lulzy looooooove each other~””How mature of you, Speedy. Like I said, it was funny how we started out. A hotdog vendor like me and a demon imp like her. She tried to eat me a couple of times, then... I guess we just started getting really close. To be honest though, she gets into too much trouble with the other demons for her own good, but she’s really protective and stuff, so I guess that’s a lot of why she gets hurt a lot. She can still be incredibly sweet sometimes... even if she does have a temper sometimes.” ”LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-“-beats with a stick-
Really quiet but destructive girl (Erua)-”Cant say I’ve seen her in a while.”-grumbles- “To be honest, I find that a good thing. The number of times she’s nearly killed us is pretty high. Those rampages of hers were a real b***h to deal with.”-nods-“So... destructive... Earthquakes... Volcanoes... boom...””Funny though, ever notice how she’s different around Murk?””Hey, they’re both pretty crazy, I guess. Maybe they complete each other?””D’awwwww.... loooooooo-“-beats with a stick-
Quamza- ”Shadow b***h!” ”Evil woman!” ”Scary... woman...” ”Shexeh heeps~” ”My only dependable warrior!” ”...my wife...” ”...” ”...” ”...” ”Shexeh heeps~” ”...” ”Hey, I hate her more than any of you do...” -blinks- -nods in understanding- -still scared- -faps- ”...” ”Like I said, I hate her more than any of you do... but where to start? Oh yes, how about we start with the part where she is a sadistic and twisted little b***h! A manipulative and hateful little piece of s**t that needs to be wiped off the face of the earth or at least caused as much pain as possible while she’s on it! She’s infuriating and condescending and destructive! And how I would love to-””Whoa s**t, dude. Chill! I hate her but ******** man, you are losing it...” -takes a deep breath and sighs- “You’re right... but I hate that b***h so much, that I curse my marriage to her even more than I curse her! Those wretched creators and their stupid pranks... the only redeeming factor about that woman is her nice body...” ”No comment.” -silence- -needs to look again--fapping- -sighs- “Kill me, please.”
Lilith- -grimaces- “I can’t really say I like her all too much. Actually, no... I hate her! Sure she acted all friendly at the beginning, but that was probably just her succubus charm talking. After that, she went and tried to kill Lulzy over some stupid argument, that b***h!” ”Adam...” -clenches fists- -growls- “What I’m saying is true, Hangman. She’s a soul sucking creature who seduces men for her own gain.” -shakes head violently- “She’s... not just... like that... She helps me... without taking my soul... she... was worried about.... me when I... got hurt... she’s a nice... person... Adam...” ”Nice person or not, her syringes have given us more problems than most of the other OCs.” -glares- ”Hey, just saying. Not saying it’s her fault of course.” ”... I’m afraid of the color pink now...”
That Green b*****d(Ornias)-”BASTAAAAARD! FIGHT ME!”-sighs- “I’m not sure if you’re insulting him or that’s your cute nickname for him. Green demon. Wings. Cocky attitude. Kind of like a high school jock.”-growls- “b*****d! Can’t he leave Lulzy alone?! How many times have we killed him already? Once? Twice? Thrice? Come on, take a hint you stupid demon b*****d! No means no! Goddamn...””... Well... yeah, Adams right. He can be a total d**k, especially if Lulzy is involved. Problem is, he’s a greater demon or something, so Lulzy’s usually in trouble... or at least that’s supposed to be the case.”-nods- “He’s pretty easy to kill sometimes...”
Oars(Oracle)-”Oars~ I like her. She’s got a sense of humor unlike some of the other guys on her team, and she actually like my pranks~””Besides that though, she’s got a pretty impressive ability, you know... being an oracle and all that.””What sucks is that the enemies can’t seem to leave her alone. She’s been attacked around twice already, and they’ve had to keep moving cause of that. ******** Lars...”-sighs and nods- “It’s pretty sad, yeah. Good thing she’s got some pretty good guardians on her team. Otherwise, we would’ve been ******** real quickly.”
Oddball(Sin)- ”Ah, Zack’s biggest fan and Oddball of the team~” “Why do you call her Oddball, Speedy? I don’t get it. I’m not sure what Oddball has to do with being a pyromancer or being an assassin, or being a guardian.””Well... it’s cause I heard Murk call her that once, and it was a pretty cute nickname, so I decided, why the hell not? Besides ,she gets to call me Geezer, so why can’t I tease her?””... Real cute Speedy.””I’ll be sending you Zack’s underwear pretty soon, kid~” ”What? No! Don’t do that!”
Kiki/Heavy(Loki)- ”Kiki~ My other aeromancer rival. One day, I’m gonna challenge her to a fight and win, just cause she’s another aeromancer. She’s cool too, she likes a good prank, just like the Oracle, and she’s lots of fun to hang out with... though she does hate it when I play the Vuvu... haters... Other than that though, she’s awesome, and one day we’ll prank the entire DC or something like that. Just wish she didn’t think I was gay like Hangman.” “You mean before or after she gets back at you for blasting her with a water hose?””Before, otherwise we’d never get to ding the prank.””Kinda feel bad for her though, she’s going through a little problem, and the one man who’s supposed to help her isn’t doing it.””What?! What happened to Kiki? Who’s supposed to help her, the b*****d.”-glares at Speedy-
Chewy(Tsurugi)- ”Respectable. Strong. Quiet. Responsible. I bet Speedy pisses the hell out of her.””Chewy~””Speedy! Can’t you call her Tsurugi? She’s already pissed of with you as is. Sure she lets you visit the DC now, but remember what it was like before that?!””Who could forget? Rocks. Explosions. Near death every time I try to climb a damn mountain. Good, ******** times...””Wow... he must really really annoy her.””You have no idea, Darren. I think it comes with the being one of her elemental opposites thing, though Loki does get along with her. Anyway, after Speedy’s fight with her, she has been easier on the guy. That’s nice to know at least.””She’s still the same old lovable Chewy to me~”-beats with a stick-
Vesi(Vesi)- ”Another one who needs to loosen up a little... but don’t let her know I said that, or she’d drown me.” “That’s a little harsh, Speedy. You barely know the woman yourself, so don’t go passing up judgement like that. Maybe it’s your fear of water and her being an aquamancer?””No, it’s cause she hit him in the face with his own prank.””... she sounds fun.”
Nyu-”Nyuuuuu~””We went over this the last time we had a commentary. Get a freaking grip on yourself Speedy. Sure she’s adorable, beautiful, sweet, kind, caring... cute... strong...... innocent, but don’t lose it. Well, basically she’s-””stolen the heart of zombie boy, way to go! Didn’t think you had a thing for girls who were part rabbit, but hey, I guess she’s a looker.””Yeah, she has, Darren, and shut the ******** up. She’s great, and she’s awesome and... I just wish she wouldn’t get into so much trouble these days. I’m glad to know she’s learning a thing or two though.””Nyuuuu~””Don’t make me get Adam in here.”
Uniporn(Aurora)-”... Uniporn? Really? Who the ******** named her this? Pretz?” ”Dammit! Just when I thought the kawaii couldn’t get any weirder, they have a unicorn screwer on their team!””Let me just say, I think everyone in the kawaii does that.””Yeah, but it’s like... it’s like I’ve only seen her either bothering Nyu, or having sex with something that has four legs! You remember Bob the Alpaca right?””... well s**t.””How dare you insult my beautiful archer of love and loveliness! I will gave you all makeovers until you apologize!””BURN IN HELL, HORROR CRAB!”
Coodles- “... the creators threw this one at me once. Still not sure what the hell it as supposed to do, but she sure scared the crap out of me.””Haha! Darren’s scared of a little monster girl!””Says the elf who as flailing mad when she wouldn’t get off his face.””Hey, wasn’t that you t-“”Moving on.”
Cake-”Haha, his name is Cake.””What is it with you demons and not leaving Lulzy alone! Die!””I can understand where he’s coming from, Adam. I mean, Lulzy is his sister, and it’s pretty weird a demon like her’s going out with a guy like you. Sure I’m all for it, but of course he won’t like it.””d**k bag needs to leave us alone.” ”I... don’t like him... very much... he’s mean... and he won’t leave... Adam and Lulzy... alone...””I’ll make him leave us alone, even if it means shoving a dozen apples down his throat...”
Freya-”She’s one of the newer OCs to come around I guess. From what I’ve been told, she’s an ice maiden from the mountains, and she’s a pretty sweet girl. Friendly’s what I mean I guess. I almost feel bad for the girl, cause she still sort of trusts her own creator, sort of. As cruel as it sounds, I hope she can see what a b***h that woman is after the Elena incident... creator b***h... Ah well, I still have to introduce her to the rest of the community when I’ve got time.”
Vincent- ”Heh, Vincent. To be honest, he kinda reminds me of myself sometimes. Sure, I’ve only known him for... um... twenty, maybe thirty, minutes, but I kinda got the feel of his personality. He seems like a bit of a spazz, but a nice guy all the same... heh... he does kinda remind me... of me.”
Roth- “Come on, Roth, lighten up a little~ I’m a little surprised that you can stay like that with a brother like Vincent... no wait, I can totally see where the stress comes from. Still, you should loosen up. Don’t think I didn’t notice what happened over at the market district with your powers... but hey, I’m just worried, kay? I’m actually glad you’re like this, cause if you weren’t I’m pretty sure Vincent would’ve gotten into trouble... lots of trouble.”
[******** snakeman (******** YOU ******** YOU ******** YOU ******** YOU!””BURN IN HELL ******** a*****e PIECE OF s**t! I’LL KILL YOU!” ”... holy s**t, you guys are fired up.””Hey, the b*****d hurt my kids, what the ******** do you expect, Cault?!””Leave Nyu alone, ******** snake. I swear, next time you try something like that you’ll get a worse treatment than Barfy!””I mean, how would you expect us to react to someone who tries to take away someone close to you?””I TOTALLY FEEL YOUR PAIN SPEEDY! KILL THE SNAKE!”
Slick-”Ah, baybeh, I luv yah sho mush~ Yar tentaclees fell sho gewd~ I jush wanna rub em all ovah meh~””GRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!””Shtay aweh frem mah wymyn,... buh ya ar pretteh shexeh~ Howsh abow ya an meh-“ ”GRUUUUUUUUUUU!” -kills Barfy-
Vega-”Heh... Star’s actually getting a slot here. Nice~” ”Introduce your little friend, why don’t you?”-blinks-“Um... okay. Star’s kind of out of place around here. He’s, well, really a star, as in the ones in the sky, and he’s told me something about being the one with the power to end stars? I’m not too sure. Point is, it’s awesome. I’m worried about him though, he’s... new, so he’s not used to what the creators do to us. Cause of that I... needed to give him... a little talk... ugh... and it didn’t ******** matter in the end cause... cause ********] ”Easy Nai...” [******** hell... I’m never treating him to drinks again... ********... he’s so sweet too, he came here to save his sister and cause of that... ugh... I hate myself.” ”But you obviously love him too, right?” -reddens- “Yeah, I do. Butt out, Speedy.”
Anya-”Annie’s so cute~””I’m guessing she’s related to Sta- Vega?”-nods- “Mhm, they’re brother and sister. She came here to explore the earth after watching it from the heavens. She’s kinda like her brother, in the sense she doesn’t have a clue about lots of things... but she’s a real adventurer, which is kinda worrying when you think about it...”
Vera-”Who would’ve known I had another sister...””I sure as hell didn’t... well not until recently at least.””To be honest I’m surprised you didn’t figure it out sooner. I mean, she really looks like you and he-“-coughs-”... right. Anyway, she’s your ordinary kid... meaning she’s a kid who can probably kick your a** using the combined power of every character on one side of the playing field.” ”She’s sweet though, and she’s kind of sensitive. I can tell she’s stubborn, and doesn’t really like doing clean up duty, but hell, who does? I’m glad to see she’s happier now than she was a while back, but I really, really, really hope she doesn’t grow up to be like her mother.”
Phi- ”GRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!” ”Mahn!” -kills Barfy-
Wishy's Characters
Wishy- ”Hee...” ”Schoolgirl crush!” ”Leave him alone, Speedy. You do know that they’re together, right?” ”...oh...” ”Hee... Wishy is... nice to me... and she’s strong too... kind of weird sometimes... random... and tall... and blue... and she has.... a finger gun...” ”She also trusts you, even when we’re talking about succubi, you charmer b*****d you. She trusts you kid, so don’t fail her.”-nods- “I wish... she was around... more often... though...”
Cai-”Ah, it’s the shapeshifter... or at least that’s what her powers seem to be. She’s a feisty one, to be honest... I quite like that.””Gah, come on, Darren, would you stop chasing after Nyu’s sis all the time? It’s a little embarrassing and I’m pretty sure the poor girl is traumatized.” ”Traumatized? Her? She’s the one shoving horse hooves up my a**!””BAHAHAHAHA!”-beats with stick- ”Ahem. Anyway, she acts as Nyu’s older sister, looking after her and all that. It’s really nice to have her around... if only she were around more often, then maybe Nyu would be in less trouble.”
Syfer-”I thought she was kinda weird when I first met her. She seemed to get along with Murk and Ves just fine, I guess.””I have no idea what to say about her either, really. I left after she first appeared cause she was talking to Vesi.””And I fell asleep~””That’s nothing to be proud of.”
Milo-”Die! Little kawaii gay boy!””Leave... me... alone...””Agh, freaking kawaii beekeeper. To be honest, I’m not sure if this guy is annoying or amusing.””Scary...””Come on, Hangman. Don’t be terrified just cause the guy has a little crush on you.”[/color=purple]-shaking- ”Boss?””I’LL ******** KILL YOU, YOU ******** KAWAII BEEKEEPER! YOU WILL PAY FOR HUMILIATING ME! PAY! PAY!” ”Don’t any of you dare touch my cute little beekeper!””It’s the horse! Get the Lysol!”
Cecilia-”I appreciate all the help she gave us over at the school incident when we had to fight Quamza.””To be honest I was kind of surprised when she came in with her badger, which kind of died... but it came back in the end.””Wish it didn’t. Little thing was a b***h to my pants. I have no idea why it just jumped in there.””Speedy!’ ”Lady... is scary... and kinda... mean...””Lady... is scary... and kinda... mean...”[color=orange]”Come on, Hangman. That’s just your regular scarlbvavbej:275]”Ah wanna shecks tha badgah~” -beats with stick-
Claude-”This guy’s... really strange. First off, he kept calling me an ugly little girl and he tried riding my back while I was looking for Nyu. Then, I overheard him calling the ugly troll-“”Ahem.””... the butt ugly troll beautiful. And now, apparently my name is Ulga.” -sighs- “Still, no denying I owe this guy big for saving Nyu from that ******** snake’s poison, even if he did try to kill me before that and told me to... er... warm her up with my body after.”
Sadie's Characters
Falon- ”Gah, friend of Luzly’s and I’d have to say she’s kind of a b***h... okay, I think she’s areal annoying b***h at times. I mean, if Lulzy wants me to call her Lulzy, why the hell are you calling me a dumbass for it!? You don’t hear me calling you a b***h for calling her Ashling!””But Adam, you call her a b***h anyway...””... shut it Speedy. Well, that aside, she’s actually a good friend to Lulzy, from what I can see. Just don’t expect the two of us to get along without Lulzy there...”
Natri- “Oh look, Natri.” ”Ah, so that’s her, huh, Darren? I’ve only met her once but she seems like a nice person. She helped get that weird closet monster thing off our faces the other day, remember? Glad she’s your girlie, ay Darren?” “...” ”Darren?”
Bessie- ”Bessie...””... she’s a friend of yours, isn’t she Pretz?” “Yeah... she started of as an experiment, I guess. A little test to see how far I could warp the boundaries... heh, I gave her a lot more personality than I accounted for. She doesn’t really like Nyu though, but I kind of wish they’d get along better... thing is, there isn’t much chance of that seeing as she ran away and I don’t know where she is anymore...” ”...”
Scarlet-”GLARGH! Scarlet is a terrifying ogre woman!” ”Speedy, that is the worst intro you could’ve given her! And damn it, she isn’t that bad! I don’t get what your problem is with her.””That’s cause you aren’t fun, Pretz. You have no idea how terrifying her and her knives can be to my free spirit and manly balls!” “You’re just chic-“ “I’D RATHER FIGHT FANPERSON! But... I guess if Zack can date her... I can oblite- tolerate her... besides, I guess she isn’t sooooo bad.”
Vivi's characters
Vivi- ”Vi-“”STOP CALLING ME HOTDOGS!” -beats with stick-”Gimme back my stick!””Stop yelling at Vivi!” “... since the other two kids are busy, I think I’ll take this one. Vivi’s a close friend of Speedy’s, it seems. She always seems to be looking out for the guy when I see her with him, and she’s a damn good trickster and fighter too. You know, what I’m gonna out and say it. I approve of their union.””My what?” ”Che... she’s nice to Speedy, but she can be pretty damn abusive at times, did you know that? She’ obsessed with hotdogs. Fricken hotdogs!” ”Hmm... I’d have to say she’s a little nuts, but there’s no denying she’s a pretty nice person or monkey once you meet her.” -grumbles- -beats with stick- ”Sorry, bro, but I’m gonna have to agree with the hotdogs vendor here. She can be a real annoying brat at times, and the fact that she won’t shut up pisses me off even more.” ”... dicks...”
Dee- ”Heh... Dee. Thanks for keeping Nyu company all this time. I’m pretty sure I can trust in you to watch over her for me, kay?” “I guess I got pretty much the same thing to say as Pretz here. Thanks for trying to cheer me up when I felt like s**t Dee, even if it was pretty weird you were telling me to break your arms to feel better. Get it through your skull that I’m not gonna do that!””Er... I guess I should thank you too Dee, you know, for being friendlier to me than Vivi usually was. So, er... thanks.””Thanks~””Thanks Dee!” “... since when did the commentary become an ‘I love Dee’ party?”
Yichi- “Ah, the birdman of the forest... or was it tengu. Sorry, anyway he’s pretty one with the forest, even if it is the first time I’ve seen him around these parts. I guess that’s pretty admirable of him, really. After all, you don’t really get too many people who want to protect the forest these days. Most of em want to use it as a war zone or as a sex zone even... it’s pretty sick!” ”You crushing on Yichi? I thought you had Star for that.”-beats with stick-
Londa- ”I barely know her and I already hate her. Honestly, the ******** would you want to team up with the snake for?!” “I’m actually with you on this one Pretz... I’ve never seen the woman/ dragon woman in my life, and the first time I do, she’s getting my kids hurt. ******** hell. I encourage setting this one on fire and feeding her to Barfy.” “Next time, I’m going to have to be really careful around new comers...”
Verso's Characters
Segway Girl- ”Segway~””Your nicknames for these people get worse every time, Speedy.” “Che, whatever. Anyway, Seggy’s nice... I guess. I don’t see her often, but on the one time I did, she helped me stop a crazy Bob from destroying the city... I think.” -blinks- “The hell... I think I saw her flying over the city and screaming out Japanese...””... are you high?” “... hope she’s... okay...” “Eh? Something happen, Hangman?”
Murk's Characters
Murk- “Er... Well... Murk is a little-“”Crazy.””I thought bipolar would be a better word for it.” “he’s beyond bipolar Speedy, sorry. I’ll say though, that despite this, the guy’s a real help. When he’s not flipping out, he usually tries to help us out... tries.””When he isn’t though, he hurts you like a ********. The hell is up with that pain personality of his? It-“”Hurts? No s**t, Darren.” ”Still, it stands to say that the guy means well, and he does come in handy as an ally and a counselor.” “If only we could help that guy out... I mean, he seems to have a problem with all these split personalities or something. I mean it must be bothering the guy...” ”Hey, maybe that’s why he gets along with the walking natural disaster. He’s chaotic on the inside and she’s chaotic on the outside.””As cool as that sounds, that’s... actually not very cool.”
Zoe's characters
Zoe- ”Zoe!””Good friend of yours, huh? Well I can understand why. She’s a sweet girl... lots of responsibility on her shoulders too.” “Sweet? Yep! And she’s brave and strong too And she’s got all these abilities and she’s nice to her friends and-“”Easy there, Speedy. We get the picture. Unfortunately, she’s like every other sweet girl in this ******** up world, meaning she’s got a lot of s**t following her around, mostly in the form of marriage. Really weird marriages sometimes. Other times though, it’s that b***h Larsetta, or sometimes that a** Eris...” ”She should be happy to know though that she’s got really good allies on her side!””She’ll be disappointed to know that our plans on saving her revolved around giving her future husband AIDS.””Urk... don’t remind me... I’m still feeling guilty over the whole pregnancy thing with her.” ”Wait...” ”... what?”
Xavier- ”I’m not gonna lie. When I first found out about him, I thought he was a total a** hole. A dirty piece of s**t... then when I found out about why he was doing things well... I guess I was able to understand why he did it.” ”Sorry, guys. I haven’t exactly forgiven him for all that crap.””Come on, Darren. He’s proven himself to be our ally every time the situation calls for it, and he’s shown since then that he’d do anything for his sister~” ”Aaaand, he’s totally gay, Darren! You could totally go for hi-“-punch- The hell made you think I’m interested in him!?”
Ishere'dal- “I like this one. Shes got spirit.” “By that, you mean there’s a possibility you’ll end up sleeping with her.” -snorts- “Shut up Speedy.” ”Don’t tell me the thought never crossed your mind, you perverted b*****d. I bet you thought with all those concubines she has it’d be alright if you added yourself to the group~””Heh... don’t make me decap you Speedy.” ”Hey... remember that she’s not only a flirt, but also pretty brilliant. That plan at the wedding was simple, but pretty genius.””Yes, and her healing ability is quite notable. Admirable even~””Darren just wants se-“-punches-
Larsetta- ”DIE!””Che... not this girl. Major pain in the a** b***h, judging from what I’ve heard and what I’ve seen.””You’re right there Darren, and a bit of a dominatrix too.””Grr... the ******** her problem? Every time she shows up, it’s to try and kill everyone or something like that. I thought we killed her... what, twice? Thrice? Once? ********, I dunno. I just know she should’ve stayed dead after the first one.” ”I managed to kill her once. It just took one astral shot to finish her... pretty easy.” ”That’s probably cause she didn’t see it coming. She’s got that annoying power steal ability and all that s**t and she seems to love picking on Zoe and the DC. I hope Barfy gets her.”
Er’al- “Ah.. our current military leader, and I’d have to say she definitely seems like a capable leader.” -nods- “I guess she is... thing is, I haven’t really seen too much of her, so I can’t say for sure.” ”Um... Er’al is... nice to me... She tried to... help me study... for my tests... I still... failed half of them... but that’s... better than... it usually is.... for me....” ”So she’s another one of Hangman’s crushes?””Oh come on... leave them alone, Speedy. I owe Er big for the mindlink she gave e and Nyu. I can’t even count the number of times that came in handy when the ******** snake or the ******** shadowbitch came around.”
Ellie- ”Ah... my “daughter”, though I don’t know where she got the idea I as her dad...” ”HAHAHA! You and Chewy had a baby! Ah wait, s**t, that image is burning my eyes! Mind bleach! Mind bleach!” ”... that’s.... pretty sick, Speedy. I can’t believe you got the image of me and Chewy screwing in your head... Though I also don’t know where Ellie got the idea we were her parents.” “She’s a pretty weird kid, Pretz... nice, but weird. Maybe that’s why she thinks it’s you two...”
Tsukiko- ”Heh, Tsuki’s on the list too, huh? Well, first thing I can say is, she’s a wolf woman or something like that. She’s also one of the nicest hostesses I’ve met. I owe her big for letting me stay over with her and Layla; the cave’s a nice change from my usual tree sleeping spots. And her cooking... well, it may look kinda weird, but trust me, you won’t regret eatin any of it~... you might regret lookin at it though...”
Layla- ”Man, where do I start?” ”Maybe with... the time that... we met her... at Eris’s place...” -winces- “That was a bit of a disaster, to be honest. I still can’t believe that her mother pretended she didn’t exist and hid her from the world. She is a real beauty, and sweet too~” -frowns- ”... yeah, but she does have that split personality problem, or the brain child problem as it’s known. Hopefully she’s found a way to keep all of them under control. If she has problems though, at least she should know she’s got me to help her~”
Eris- ”Tch... I still haven’t totally forgiven her for the incident with Zoe, and also the one with Layla.” -growls- “You saw what she did to Zoe back there... I’m glad Zoe was able to kick her a** in the end anyway... -thinks- Funny though... I saw her a while back, and she and Zoe didn’t seem to be fighting much... not as much as I expected someone to have chopped you apart to...” ”... she’s also quite nice to Layla though... even if she did seem like the initial b***h.” -thinks about pendant- “...”
That fat dude at the wedding (Humphrey von Littleshoe)- “I’m guessing they chose this guy for the wedding cause he’s in a high position or something. Definitely not cause he’s the most handsome guy in the bunch, or the brightest.” “That’s pretty mean, Darren. The guy didn’t seem sooo bad.” ”I’d have to say, I agree with Darren on this, Speedy. It was... quite comedic how he acted up until the plan worked, and how he fawned over Zoe was a little frightening...” “I’m being the nicest guy for once?! Holy s**t! Anyway, I just hope Isa’s taking care of the guy...”
Mia- -low whistle- “She’s cute, smart and pretty tough for a fifty year old. I think I’d like to get to know her better.” ”Er... before you get any weird ideas on Darren, she’s also a titan, which means she ages slower than normal people do.” -coughs- “Whatever.” -grumbles- “She’s one of those council bastards, isn’t she? Dammit... she’s one of the ones who decided that Zoe should get married, isn’t she?! That b*****d... though I gotta admit, I find it hard to stay mad at her, with all that nasty coughing, it’s hard not to...” “Too true... I’m surprised she’s been able to live with that condition for long... hope she finds a cure soon.”
Rowland- “He seems like an impressive man. Very business like at times, powerfully built and loyal... sounds... sounds familiar...” “... Elise, he might remind you of him but-“ ”I know, I know, Darren! All I’m saying is he’s a great guard and a loyal follower. Sure, the council have had bad publicity, but from looking at him, he seems like a very loyal young man.”
Calypso- -whistles- -grimaces- -blinks- “Um...” “You call me over to the warehouse and the first thing you show me is you trying to get that woman! How typical of you to do something like that!” “Hey! She came onto me! I was just giving her what she wanted.” ”Ugh... I don’t like her all too much either... I just don’t feel comfortable around her.” “You’re just like that Rowland guy... he doesn’t seem to trust her either, I don’t see why though.” “Well maybe it’s because she’s a floozy!” ”Oh shut up, Elise! What’s the problem with you!” “I think you two need counseling.” ”Butt out, Speedy!” [******** off, Speedy!”
Roy- ”Ugh... an incubus. As if the city needed another sex eating creature... well, I guess that part’s a little unfair. The guy seemed fine... cept for the part that he told me that he’d wait for me to grow up... a little messed up, if you ask me... Still, not a bad guy.”
Sweetest Nightmare’s characters
Naru-”Ah, Naru, my love... heh. I wonder how an ordinary blacksmith like me can land a goddess girl like her. I was kinda surprised when she went up to me and asked me out like that. It’s a little chaotic being around her, though, because her OC family is always flying around and stuff... she also taught me about the ones they call creators. I’ve been wondering about her memory, as someone told me that she’s forgotten everything, but the way she makes it sound is it’s so bad that she shouldn’t remember it... I wonder...”
False's Characters
False- ”Oh hey! I didn’t think Doc would make it to this list! To be honest I haven’t really seen the guy since I stopped going to the dome as frequently as before...” “Actually, the guy’s been around this place... not too often, but I do see him sometimes.” ”Really? Cool~ I remember Doc was a little less uptight than some of the other guys I met at the place... not really the best guy to leave me with cause we still could end up killing each other or someone else, but he’s pretty friendly and funny~” “False is a pretty okay guy, I guess...” -mumbles- ”... hehehe... why so jealous, Pre-“ -beats with stick-
Speed's characters
Speedy- ”Ah... this guy. He’s the best of the best. Strong... Fast... Witty... stronges wind elf around... powerful enough to take down one of the strongest pyromancers in the city...” ”Idiotic...” ”Smells like a dump...” ”Clumsy...” “Tactless...” “... d**k...” “Come on, guys! I can’t be that bad, can I?” -glares- “Sometimes, you’re even more annoying than Darren at a single’s bar.” ”Hey!” ”You mean well, you try to take care of us, I understand that, but you’re also an idiot. You’re too rash in what you do most of the time, and even when it does work out, at least one person goes home with llama s**t in his face.” ”That’s just... that’s just cruel, Darren!” ”Speedy, we know you care... hell, you’ve probably got one of the biggest hearts around here... just not the brains. Sure you’ll fight for our honor or whatever, but we’d rather you also stopped stealing other peoples’ toilets. We do like you... somewhat.” ”Yeah, and from I heard you sure are the lady killer around these parts...” “Yep, and one of the ballsier ones too... I guess... I mean you rushed that dragon pretty quickly.” ”Didn’t you guys hear me when I said he was idiotic?” “Sniff... aww... I’m touched you gu-“ ”You’re... mostly... a d**k...” ”...” -beats with stick-
Darren- ”Guys, shut u-“ ”Flirting b*****d!” ”Blue fetishist!” ”Womanizing a*****e!” Dickdickdickdickdick-“ -hit with meteor- ”... did I mention somewhat violent?” -growls- “Hey, I’m doing my best to change, okay? At least it’s better of than the way I used to be...” ”True, you’ve been a lot more helpful lately. Relief work turning you into a reformed man, Darren?” “Tch, I’m doing the work cause I want to piss the creators off and stop them. Not cause I like any of you at all, got it?” -growls- “You continue to talk like that Darren, and I’ll kick your a**. I don’t care if you’re the strongest in our team, I will shove your head up your a*****e.” ”H-h-hey, you two. No fighting!” ”C’mon... drop the “I don’t care” act... I saw how you tried to save Zoe in that incident with Eris.” ”Darren, you can’t mean that... I mean, you do this for Natri too, right?” ”... keep her out of this...” -turns away-
Pretzels- ”Me? Well, I guess I can say I’m somewhat of a scienti-“ ”FRANKENSTEIN LOLICON FURRY MAN!” ”... real mature, dad. Anyway, I’m a bit of a scientist, if I don’t say so myself.” ”And quite the freak, as everyone else might say. You’re an odd one, you know that?” -grumbles- “I get it! Being all stitched together, robotic and hungry for anything that does and doesn’t move makes me different! Now shut up!” -cocks an eyebrow- “You forgot to mention you were like your old man more than you wanted to be and you get a little... er... crazy... at times~” -mumbles something- “Anyway, I’m also proud to ay I’m Nyu’s man and-“ ”Not yet! You still gotta prove yourself!” ”... We all know your proving test is less of that and more of you trying not to take care of the farm.” ”Lies!”
Elise- ”You don’t see me much, but that’s only because I keep myself busy, unlike my other two teammates...” -cocks an eyebrow- “Pretty arrogant for a second in command.” ”Don’t be such a d**k, Darren. If it wasn’t for her, Lulzy’d be dead by now...” ”Yeah, and I mean she was the one who pulled our team together, Darren~” -rolls eyes- “Whatever...” -grins- “See? They appreciate my-“”She can be a bit of a b***h at times though...” ”...”
Popsy- ”Hm... mere words cannot describe my greatness... I must sing!”
-gets the instruments-
”Popsy is handsome, Popsy is great!”
”He only gets off when he masturbates~”
”Popsy ‘s repulsive, head full of lice~”
”I also heard he’s into guys~”
Adam, Speedy, and Darren: Oy ye oy ye oy ye oy ye oy ye oy ye ay~
”I am Popsy in toilet, came from your rear end~
Adam, Speedy, and Darren: Oy ye oy ye oy ye oy ye oy ye oy ye ay~
”I am Siege and I like to ride a Shadow b***h~”
”I’LL ******** KILL YOU ALL!”
TBC Cause this ******** too long XDD
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