You know i realy dispise this world. I have had this HUGE thing for this woman that I'm friends with (more than a crush, less than 'every time i see her i have to stop and stare'...though that dose happen sometimes wink ). And what sucks is that I've had these feelings for about three...maybe four years now, (i have a crapy memory and cant think of when exactly it was that i fell for her sweatdrop ). And she knows too. I asked her out a few times, and we did actually date for a while, only for me to find out I'm not really her type or something. I never did fully understand her reason for dumping me i just sorta accepted it. Like the compleate idiotic fool that i am. Though i guess in the eyes of society we didn't really date, we never did anything we never progressed farther than holdin hands. I know, I'm a lamo. But, I realized somewhere from the begining to the middle of our relationship that i really cared for this woman, and that i wanted to the lasting relationship for her to be the one, my one. In the end it was probably those feelings that made me so overcautious that i pretty much tied the nuse around the neck of our relationship. But then again when one is blinded by love, (or lust, I've never been good at tellin the difference sweatdrop ) they become idiots. And i know wahmbulance all im doin is complanin, at least i still have her as one of me closest friends,most people don't even get that much. But i still have yet to tell what truly sucks, next saturday, (Feb. 6, 2010) I have a date with said woman. Now I know what your thinkin, I've just been tellin you how much i adore this woman and now I'm complanin cause I've got a date with her, but just hear me out for a sec. Why it sucks so much, and why i dispise this world so much is this, I have a girlfriend the date is to a formal dance that I'm bein requierd to go to, or wright a 2,000 word essay about the history of the dance! My girlfriend dosen't want to go to the dance because she dosen't like the conformity of it, so she bailed. I was talking to my friend about it and how now i have to decide wether to go stag, (alone, dateless, ect. chose whatever you want i go with stag cause most people don't know what it means so you can say it and not look like a compleate loser cool ) or actualy look for a date. And her reply when i tell her my perdicament is, "I'll go to the dance with you." I just barley stoped my self from tripping over my own feet. I hadn't expected her to say somethin like that, (I've drempt it but that was totally different, in the dream we were still toghether sweatdrop ). So my logical mind shuts down and me basic controls take over acceptng her proposal without a momments hesitation. So here i sit just about a week before the dance and i know that saturday will be a disaster, I mean with a woman this beautiful, ( heart and i seriously mean beautiful, like angels must tear up enraged with jelousy she's so beautiful and thats only talking about her face not to mention the rockin hot body she also has heart ) I could and can hardly contain myself when i was and am with her. So dancing with her...........I'm not even gonna say it. So again you may ask what I still see as a problem for me to hate and dispise this world? Well it's not that i dispise the world more like how now that i've gotten somewhat (not by much, hardly any, really. But the closest I've ever been) overher. Somethin like this happens. Again I know, wahmbulance it's just with woman anything is possible and maybe that's one of the millions of things that attracted me to Beatriz in the first place. But the matter still stands. And i will be goin and i will party me @$$ off, but at the same time i know this is my D-day. So to all of you this is me farewell and good luck to you all *salutes* pirate . But i do have a question for you as i leave this world behind are you people just that bored that you actualy read to the end of this or did you actualy find this interesting? Send me your replys! Peace, Day/Night walkers!
xBONE_MANx Community Member 
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