Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

So, drama, drama, drama decided to be a llama in my life this week. I swear, I've never had to deal with so much s**t before in my life. It's like my whole life has gone bottled up, then once I hit almost twenty, it decides to explode. It's kinda overwhelming and very weird.

So, I didn't lose my job. It's really confusing, trust me it is. They hired a full-time sitter because they thought that my classes started this week, but once they found out that that was a wash, they gave it back to me, and decided to use the sitter as a back up. While I feel slightly empowered, I just odd. They choose me over someone who's certified to take care of kids.

*shrug* Eh, I'm not complaining.

I'm still trying to find a second job. It's a pain, yes, but I really, really need one. I can't live on what I make with the Lovett's. I love them and Paul to death, but I only get paid seven dollars an hour, and that's not enough. It's a real pain in the a**.

Minimum Wage is supposed to be enough to live off of, right? Assuming that you work forty hours a week. Bullshit, not in most places in this country. Minimum Wage won't cover half of your expenses. It's ridiculous. Land of Opportunities my a**.

Anyhow, it's a good thing that I still have my job. :3 Now I can get back on track and get cracking with my cosplays! And go visit Josh. Hee. <3 <3 <3

--

I cleaned a little more in my room today. It really was a disaster, you have no idea. But it's getting into shape! I can actually walk INTO my closet the entire way now! I still have about six or seven boxes to still go through, but it's mostly old stuffed animals and stuff, so it shouldn't be too bad.

And I found a twenty dollar bill today in an old pair of pants. Wtf. Lol.

--

I was supposed to go over to Tamara's for a little while today to discuss cosplay stuff, but it didn't happen. =.=;; My mother decided to be a b***h, and decide that we JUST had to watch a family movie. We NEVER watch family movies. Dad isn't even in town, and she has to pick THE ONE DAY that I have stuff to do. Nevermind my plans, they don't matter at all. Ugh. So ANOTHER day gone to wast in that spectrum.

On a better cosplay note, I ordered my paperclay last night. I'm gonna need a s**t ton more, prolly, for both cosplays, but it's not expensive at all, so I don't think that it's much of an issue. :3 I got two packages to start out, so we'll see. I think that two will be enough for Slave Leia, but I know that I'm going to need to get more for T-Elos. *shrug* Eh, shouldn't be too, too bad.

--

I watched TMNT tonight, the new Ninja Turtles movie. Now, I'm a fan of the old ones, so I wasn't sure what to think going into this one, but I have to say, I highly enjoyed it. I didn't like it as much as the older ones, but it was fun and had stunning animation.

--

So, Ian decided he was going to blow things up tonight. He's the one who was causing all the trouble and drama this past week.

We'd playing "Status-tag" for the past few days, not actually talking to each other, but arguing through our AIM statuses. Finally, he messaged me telling me that enough was enough. I shrugged it off and told him, "You didn't have to reply, ya know."

Of course, that set him off. He's nothing but a jealous b*****d. He accused me of not caring, for anything. Him, Me, anyone, anything. Um... I was really confused. O.o I told him that I didn't want confrontation. He was the one who wouldn't hear me out.

So he told me to speak. And I did.

I told him that I didn't even know what our relationship was. I thought it was friends, he thought it was a little more than that (which it wasn't), and I told him that neither of us were happy about anything. It was a terrible relationship. Ugh. I told him that I took his advice-- I chose what made me happy, and dealing with his drama was certainly was not it.

For once, I listened to him, and he got mad.

Here's what I sent him:

"I chose my own happiness, just like you said I should. I'm not happy with you. I'm sorry. It hurts, or its irritating. I chose Josh over you, cause he makes me rather happy. You don't want to be friends, that's fine. I can understand why. I didn't think that after hanging out with Josh, who I've never really hung out with a lot, I would come to like him that much. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is. But in the end, you and I, I'm not even sure what we had anymore. But it wasn't very satisfying on my end."

And he told me fine. That I was a b***h, to delete him from my friends list and to never call him again. And I said fine by me.

It's a really sad way to end things-- I've known him for a really, really long time. But.. he grew up, and wasn't the same person.

Ah well, what's done and said is done and said.

I'm happier than ever before, knowing I won't have to deal with it anymore. Now I can move on and be a better person.