(In case you were wondering about the title, ive decided to title all my journal entries after song titles and i thought this one would fit. but im NOT depressed! sweatdrop )
Yea so i recently realized how much rejection sucks. No i didnt ask anyone out or anything but this guy that i've really liked since 7th grade was either coming to our school next semester or going to another school. (im trying not to use any names of schools or ppl here and its hard!) I was really excited cause yea i still like him. Well i asked my friend, who is dating his friend, if he was coming to this school or not and she said no. So i was a little upset. and she said "No offence but i asked (his friend) and he said that he was like not interested in you...at all..." so yea that was really upsetting. Cause even if someone that i like doesnt like me i dont care. But when i find out that the guy i like doesnt like me then its like well that sucks. So i dont want to say im over him but im still kinda upset...I didnt tell my mom this (normally i would and i probably will later but) but i told Emily and i dont know it still really sucks. It makes me wonder if ill ever meet a really nice guy.
I mean Emily may have found her first love. (btw Emily is my best friend. we met in kindergarten. friends for 10 years.) Shes like head over heels for this guy. Hes a year younger than her. His name is David (no not Jon's brother another David) And like all she wants to do is talk about him. And i dont really mind it im happy shes happy. But at the same time i feel really i dont know...wierd...thats not the word im looking for but you get the picture. Like it makes me want to meet my first love. And then i wonder will i ever meet my first love. Will i ever meet any love for that matter.
You see people in high school lable you for what they think you are. Because i like anime and i hang out with people who like anime (no offence! i love you all to death!!) people assume that im all about anime and that anime is my life. But when you walk into my room how many anime things do i have? Compare that to other people. Im not all about anime and thats what people lable me as. Thats why im not going to the anime club at school. I dont want people to lable me as an anime freak but at the same time i want someone to like me for who i am.
Alright. If you go to my school and have a yearbook look up Emily Hunning (something like that.) Ok. Shes the girl who went to homecoming with the guy that i like. Shes really pretty and really nice. But she flirts with like EVERYONE! at least thats what i see. And i dont know it just makes me wonder: I know im not that pretty but why cant i meet a nice guy? Or why doenst he like me? Or why cant he like me? And why is it that all of my good guy friends like me when i dont feel the same way about them? And then all of my friends tell me that "we'd make the cutest couple" or "you like him" when i dont! I dont know. Its just when ever i meet a guy that i like its like i dont even exist. Why cant a guy feel the same way that i feel about them?
I dont know its like will i ever meet the right guy? I dont want to be labled as somthing im not. Yes i like anime, but its not my life. I like other things but people who dont know me assume that all im about is anime. I dont know its like no one really understands me or even takes the time to...I dont. Why is love so complicated. I know im only 15 but id like to have my first kiss at least. So that way in college i dont go on a date and have my first kiss then. And for some reason i have this strong feeling that im going to meet the guy im going to marry in college. I dont know why but thats how i feel. *Sigh* Why is love so complicated?
Sorry everyone for making you read so much but this journal is my way of getting things out that need to be said. I really appreciate you guys taking the time to read this. You guys are really great. And i really love comments! So comment!
And for the record. im NOT depressed just thinking outloud. I do this a lot. And talk to myself...but thats a whole nother thing completely! sweatdrop
View User's Journal
Rose Petals: The Story of the Midnight Rose
This is the story of the midnight rose. Or just somthing for me to do when im bored. I'll type a mini story or what ever i feel like typing that day. So deal with it! Heehee!
~+Draw my OCs+~
Wanna know how much I love you? Go outside when it's raining and count all the raindrops that hit you. All the raindrops that don't hit you is the amount I love you.
~+Come Visit my Shop+~
Wanna know how much I love you? Go outside when it's raining and count all the raindrops that hit you. All the raindrops that don't hit you is the amount I love you.
~+Come Visit my Shop+~
User Comments: [5] [add]
|
~White Dragon Kisara~ Community Member |
[8]Ball
Community Member |
|
|
Burning_Star_IV Community Member |
Skae the halloweenie
Community Member |
|
User Comments: [5] [add]
Community Member