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i just realized today i lost a friend...a very good friend. And I can't be the same without them. And so im still crying as i type this...im srry about everything. everything. And if i know...him as well as i do...he'll find it in his big heart to forgive him. Hes like a brother to me and i don't want to be anything more. i guess i didn't realize until now and im so stupid. just wanted...to let u know. And as i read once: How can i understand myself if you won't be able to?