Please get the word out to people off gaia if u feel like it.. but i really am just truly from my heart sorry...
im sorry that i couldnt be the friend i need to... when u needed me... im sorry that i wasnt there... when you tried to help me or u needed help.. im sorry i didnt listen... when u were right and i didnt believe you im sorry... when u trusted me and i failed you... when we were talkin... im sorry i said the wrong thing... when i was upset... im sorry i didnt dare to see how u were feeling... when all u were asking was for a good friend... im sorry you thought that that was me... i want to make everything right but evertime i try i fail... and i ask my self! Why and never get the answer... i ask how and i relize i loose a par of me and no matter what you think a piece of me dies when i loose a friend... and ive always known my outlook ... (How to save a life is my favorite song) and ive always wondered... how do i save the life and realationships i have with my friends... and i think maybe its not them who needs to be saved.... Maybe its me. im so srry.... please 4give me... PLEASE!.....
I am not in the best of ever getting anything right... im always confused and always thinking and dreaming, wishing and hoping, im always searching for the truth.. the truth hurts... But i can never find truth... but i end up getting hurt anyway.. i feel as tho i take people with me.. i dont wanna hurt anyone.. i dont wanna make ur life a living screwed up place. I want u to be happy... i wld never try to do anything intentionalt to hurt you.. so i just wonder why would u wanna hurt me. SWhy do you talk about me behind my back and not treat me the same way.. Why cant i trust some of you to be there why do you make assumptions that leave me hurt and depressed. why are you there to mock me and hurt me instead of just being honest and keeping to your word.
Why am i so loud.. because i want my words to be known and my feelings to be shown... why do i start conosations and never finish them.. because im wondering if i can trust you and why the H3ck am i tellin you if you sont even care. I bet the ones that care would have read this thing by now. While you complain ive written to much and dont care that ive poured my heart out. Im sorry im that girl that i guess u assume to much well just forget what you know. i know its impossible to start over but i wish you treatme fair. I have no clue who MOSTLYv anyone is anymore.
Yea i can write this long letter but dont ask why i said the things i did. ur only gona get mad at me that i dont answer u. and if i try to ill end up upseting you or not sayin the right words. I cant answer you because i rarely use my heart. and this is from my hart. so at school dont ask bout this.. and if you do and i say i cant answer dont get mad because im using my mind at that moment. Im afraid to use my heart around anyone 4 for fear you guys will break it. And thats happened to me by many of you. and you just dont know the pain u have caused me. Im soory if i ever hurt u. just please if ur going to be my friend Then Be my friend and if your not then.... just honestly let me know i cant trust you with my feelings... 4 fear that u might hurt me.
Im strivin so hard to just be Me .. which i think none of you have ever known. the quiet me that really keeps to themselves and im not joking.. srry if i dont answer your tex or call you back or come online as much. I just think i need to avoid some things so that i dont start drama with anyone.. i just wanna live life without the ones i love hurting me.
So if u ever have something to ask me.. u shld refer to the above statements.... and see if it answers ur questions...
qtcuteness Community Member 
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