This is the first time I'm writing in this journal and I want to share with you all my thoughts and dreams. Sitting in front of my laptop and aimlessly typing is rather relaxing. My parents are arguing outside like they do everyday and I'm listening to the sounds of DBSK 3nodding
My life is a rather messy sad story and I don't want to ruin anyone’s fabulous day with such crap (sorry for swearing) so I will talk a little bit only. I am Sayuri Outori but my REAL name is Isabella Tan. I am half jap, half chinese but i like the japanese side of me better. I mean, sushi and manga I can live on forever! And Jpop music.. heart Ok, well lets all start off with my past since its the MOST interesting thing to talk about. Let’s see... Well, my father married twice and both of them are still alive and they hate each other. But they only argue in a way women can.
For example:
My mum: Oh you look so beautiful today!
Mum 2: So do you!
My mum: Wow, your anti-wrinkle cream works very well!
Mum 2: I see you’ve dyed your hair again to black!
Both: HOHOHO!! laughs
Yes... that is the world of madness women. Sigh. I hope i never will have to endure such pain. whee
Anyways... yeah. My dad is rich and its not that much of a benefit. I realised 2 years ago that most of my friends were just after my money and using me as a stepping stone. Great.
They were people I knew for 6 years. Ah well, the truth hurts. Um.. what else? Oh yes, my love life. Well, I have dated the past guys. Justin when I was 5 years old, Charles when I was 8, Maxwell when I was 9, Adam when I was 11, Edison when I was 12, Nick when I was 13 and this year I am currently single.. for now. My first love, Justin hurt me rather badly.
We were together and we kissed and all and he had to leave Malaysia for a year (where I live) and when he came back, I ran up to hug him and he was all.
“Who are you?”
Talk about ouch. At the beginning, he promised he would never forget me. When he left he always wrote letters every week. But soon, the time between lengthened and before long, the letters just stopped coming. Ever since then, I have never kissed a guy.
Sigh.
Other than that, my life has been ok. I’ve made true friends, I have found my passions, schoolwork is fine and I’m a straight A student. However, my parents just argue. Every parent does that. Mine throw plates at each other. I’m sure other parents do too. So anyways, I’m going to finish off with a poem I wrote about Justin.
As the sand in the hourglass empties,
We cross paths day to day.
Yet our eyes are downcast,
Our walk is slow,
Our minds blocked by the past we knew.
As the hourglass is reversed,
The innocence of the past is remembered.
One girl,
One boy.
The promise that they shared.
As the grain of sands empty,
The pain of the past is recalled.
One girl,
One boy.
The promise that was forgotten.
The pain of remembering,
The blood of those who died,
In your heart,
In my heart.
Will forever stain the innocence of the young.
The kiss that flared the fire within my soul,
The kiss that drew me closer yet farther from you.
The kiss that broke my already shattered heart,
The kiss that ended it all.
We cross paths and eyes meet,
Memories flare but the flame dies as you turn away.
I could see no recognition, I can see no compassion- only silent eyes.
Hast thou remembered or are you hiding behind a mask?
Old photographs and words fade away,
Years past and we don’t speak again.
Yet we don’t cherish our memories,
Our words-everything we’ve ever said.
A single touch,
a thousand tears,
Hearts broken-never to be put together again,
Yet a single promise, Our promise-broken over time.
Our paths turning away from each other.
And to this day…
Though we walk side by side,
Will our hearts ever heal?
Our memories cherished/remembered?
And will the barriers between us fall again?
[“I will always love you...” was what you said. ]
Phew,
My hands hurt. I am going to turn in for the night so.. good night and have fun GAIAing! xd
 Princess_Jasmyne · Sun Nov 16, 2008 @ 01:45pm · 0 Comments |
