At 4:30 a.m., I stirred from Mom walking through my room to turn off my music. She gets back to the door and turns to see my eyes are open. She switches on the light. "Rodney died a couple of hours ago."
I was still partly asleep, and the words didn't run clearly through my brain. "Rodney who?"
"Rod-man Goggans," she responded.
"What? How did he die?" I was beginning to realize the seriousness of her words.
She could've put it in a softer tone. Maybe something like, "Alexa, Mr. Rodney is gone. He died not too long ago from a heart attack." But no, she gets straight to the point like I had the day before when joking about Cameron; I was bluffing Whitney and told her I no longer had a baby brother. "Oh, he died", I said. Never will I again joke with such straight-to-the-point, cold-hearted words.
Mom had a serious face. "He had a heart attack." She apparently didn't know how to explain it too well....or subtly.
I stared in shock. I asked the time, but answered my own question by making out the hands on my bed-side clock. She told me that Dad had been to the hospital already, or well, he had in fact just come home. I stared off in space still.
She finally turned off the light and went back to the living room full of voices.
The thought ran through my head. I turned my stereo back on to listen to Finch. Idiotic idea that was, it didn't help at all. I cried myself to sleep after I began to realize the effect of what had happened.
I woke up the next morning thinking that possibly it was a dream. I've had real-like dreams before. I turned over to see that there were mascara stains on my pillow. This wasn't a dream.
 The Sexsa Effect · Thu Nov 11, 2004 @ 10:07pm · 0 Comments |
