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I'm spending a week at my friend Amanda's.

-I'm cleaning her room and OMFG she has freaking cotton ball bits EVERYWHERE as well as jewelry and purses and shoes and clothes!! I swear, it's like a personal hell to clean her room for me.

-My cousin Shane ran away from home.

-My sister Jessica was trying to get us (my mum and I) kicked out of our little apartment so she and her boyfriend and kid could take it and leave my mother and I homeless.

-My mother basically told my father not to pick me up this summer to visit him and my gran Ann because my little sister went to live with her dad and mum doesn't want to loose her little free labor & sence of being needed. ( Sence I still don't have a damn job I guess I DO need her, ugh. )

-Zeek hasn't talked to me at all in FOREVER and a random comment from him claiming I hate him (as if I could hate Zeek even if I wanted to) does not count. I'll accept that Zeek still loves me in some way but...

-I wasn't sure wether Zeek was still even remotely 'mine' and I really can't stand it anymore so if his lack of talking to me at ALL wasn't breaking up with me then I guess I made it a break up now. Don't get me wrong; I love Zeek very dearly. Zeek is my everything... I'm just sick and tired of makeing myself sick over Zeek. I'm tired of crying at anything that makes me think too much about Zeek.

-My gran Ann has been having some heart problems.

-My father currently has no job (as far as I know).

- I still have no job and also have no phone at all now at least (hopefully) only for a little while. My mother didn't pay the cell phone bill. >:

- Being around my mother gets me pissed off. A part of me SERIOUSLY hates the woman. Even though I could never hit her back I had stood up to her once and then she called the cops on me and made me see some suicide people or whatever because I said something I didn't mean and it was stupid. She wasn't worried about me. She was worried about the possibility of me getting angry enough to hit her.

- I'm horrible at makeing choices and I'm so unused to people wanting to love me that when I have more than one person who loves me I'm completely confused and feel harassed and stress myself out. A lot of times I'd push both people away and just try to get someone else.

-I care a lot about a friend that is very very dear to me, Jon. He's seen me in one of my totally emo meltdowns and he really tries to understand me. I've known him for years now and I can't even remember what it was like without him around. Heh, and to think I'd first made friends with him because he was rude and happened to get my curiousity up. I love this guy, in more ways than one. I've never shared my feelings with anyone else the way I share them with him. He tries to make me happy when I'm dipping into total Emo and he's never started any real drama. He's a comfort.

- I also have another friend, Chall, he's so sweet and cute and even when I'm being a rain cloud he can at least get a smirk out of me. Caim is almost like him. They are both awesome and I have luff for them. ♥

-I'm going to Ohayocon this year!! It'll be my first con that wasn't free and in a community colledge. oo; ^^ I hope it'll be lots of fun and that I get lots of pictures of cosplayers!! <3


Well, I'm pretty much calmed down. It's freaking freezing right now. I'm doing Manda's laundry and cleaning the room her mother and her call 'Tommi's room' Sence I'm over so much and sleep in there. -snickers- I'm also still working on Manda's room. ( gonk crying WILL IT EVER END?! )

Later.