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I just needed to be wrung out
Although the above was composed by a fictional serial killer, I would like to side with him anyways. The first rain snuck up on us last night, but I was not at all surprised when I walked outside to find it there. We were leaving the theater, and as we walked the rows of empty parking spots to the car, I felt truly at home. I clung to his arm with my face in his sleeve, trying to keep the droplets out of my eyes, and I was reminded that I was head over heels in love. In that moment, I realized how happy I was and that everything, no matter how bleak at times, would work out in my life. I've been looking for something to help give me that boost, not even necessarily in the right direction; I'd be fine going just about anywhere. It seems like I've been sitting still for too long and that desire to simply move a limb or even a brain cell has been absent. When it comes to keeping that motivation to do well or at least do something alive, I need to reap and sow it all, reminding myself constantly. The rain, for me at least, does in fact wash everything away and gives my mind a somewhat metaphorical clean slate. I kept the windows open all night so that as I laid in bed after making love, still high and imbued with endorphins, I was able to fall a sleep surrounded by the comforting sound and smell of fresh rain. I felt like I was floating in midair, wrapped in a blanket of fervor and triumphant weakness, stirring only thoughts of how rejuvenated I felt right then. I get so lost in everything that goes wrong that I am blinded to the little things that make every day worth it; I make it hard on myself. There is so much wonder and inspiration to be discovered out there. As for the rain, I welcome it and want to soak it all in, letting all this dirt wash down the storm drain. The sun is shining now and it's a new day, and it really is beautiful.
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