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Gimme!Gimme! Gimme! (A Man After Midnight). . . |
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((Insanity would be the least of my worries.))
Half past twelve / And I'm watching the late / show in my flat all alone. / How I hate to spend the / evening on my own. / Autumn winds / blowin' outside my / window as I look around / the room. / And it makes me so / depressed to see the / gloom. / Is there a man out there? / Someone to hear my / prayer?
Dearist stranger, if your reading this then you should be warned that there will be mentions of insanity on my part, and that everything is settled now.
I have seperation anxity (minor) and a fear of being forgotten (major). Where the separtation anxity goes away after a while, the fear only grows if I have been left alone. Which does not bode well for me on the rare days everyone is gone from the house, particularly in the evenings it is really bad because I can't call up a friend. The cure, I know, is to know that there are real humans I can talk to and get a response from, and where I know that Gaia has forums where I can talk to different people (no one ever accused me of being an idiot), it's not the same as a human voice in real time conversations.
Another thing is I have a hard time falling asleep without people in the same building as me. Call it a fear of the house being broken into and not wanting to be the only one their. So, to make up for the fact no one is home, my energy spikes till I have a hard time standing still, and an even harder time sitting still. My hands will start to shake, with all the extra energy, and I always feel like I could run a mile, which though is nice, all it is are nerves which I don't want. And no, taking a sleepy time tea doesn't help, it just tastes nasty without the sugar.
So, when I was left alone earlier this evening, I couldn't rest, and was getting very frustrated at life because there was nothing I could do to get rid of the engergy and I had started talking to my self, in a really loud voice. Louder then the music I turned on later to counter the silence. Luckily I have more then cats to talk to now if I need to talk to people, which I accually rarely need to do, so I am safe for the moment from insanity. Which I am very glad about.
I think everyone now knows why I chose this particular Abba song, which is in Mamma Mia (great girl's night musical, though I still love the Disney classics).
No longer twichy and insane.
Tanith Tainted Hope and Kattitina.
 Tanith Tainted Hope · Wed Jul 30, 2008 @ 07:52am · 0 Comments |
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