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Day #4
04-JUNE-2008 3.59PM

You know what I realised today? I have changed - Gone are the days when mmy biggest worry was what to wear to the party or which boy I liked. These days its all about what I want to do with my life, whether I have enough money to pay my board.

When did it change? When did the stresses of adulthood take old of my adolencence and destroy it? Suddenly I look in the mirror and see a face I want to cover with makeup, Every morning I consider whether I need that gym membership yet, I look in my wallet or at my back statement and wonder how I will survive another month without running out of money.

I want the days where I could have a harmless joke with a friend - didn't have to watch what I ate and didn't care whether I had the money to hang out with someone.

Golly gosh;

Anyway - onto todays blog. Nothing much going on today - Just getting ready to spend the weekend in Sydney. Will post as many pictures as I can of the trip =]

Talking to Rodney about something. He still thinks I want to kill him. I guess I really succeeded in being a b***h to him. Now that I don't be such an a*****e he thinks it's strange. The truth is I've changed in the last 9 months.

One day I'll post one of our convos. It proberly won't be halarious to you because of all out in jokes - but eh you might lol as much as I do.

Can't wait for Sydney this weekend. Spending time with Cazy in the biggest city in Australia. Well thats not whats exciting - Its the fact that we're actually going to be together for a few days and doing fun things. I hope maybe I can relax for the first time in a few weeks.

So I guess I should talk about something in my life like I have in previous blogs. Tell you my stories. Considering we're all made from our many houndreds of thousands of stories. Or at least thats how I think.

Today's story will be about school I guess. I went to school in Glen Innes with some of the best and worst people I have ever met.

Mostly worst.

Anyway I moved to Glen when I was four - the next year I started kindergarten at the primary school in Glen. That year I met some of the girls I am stil very close to. Hex*, Lizardbird*, Devii*, and Stiffy*. I also met some of the girls that even today don't like me for the things that have in the past been problems, they are not important enough to name.

Primary School was proberly even worse then highschool - as I spent the majority of primary school by myself without friends due to anger problems and a violent streak which on more then one occation I let fly at teachers or students.

Highschool started in the year 2003 with lots of excitement. I really thought maybe it was my chance to become popular and cool. Sadly I didn't become any cooler but I did get more friends. I even got called hot by some of the older boys, but I must admit in year 7 I didn't really like boys.

Well I didn't like them til I met Pearlin and Joe*. Funny how things just happen.

The same day I met them I finally found a "clique" that I fit in. We were hanging out at the athletics carnival. Yeahhh I know "real cool" lol.

Me and three girls in particular who really got along had sat right up the back of this HUGE grand stand and Pearlin and Joe* came and sat with us. Loz* had a big crush on Pearlin at the time and so she was flirting with him. I was so nervouse being that close to real boys. Like boys two grads above us. Danny* and Ash* had gone to get some food from the canteen so I was left there with Loz* who was smitten and not even paying attention to me and Joe* who was paying attention to me, making jokes and trying to start a conversation with me. I was so nervous that all I could manage was "yes" "no" and a giggle now and then.

Pass a few weeks and I found I too had a crush on Pearlin. We ended up dating for about a month. He was my first kiss - I'll always remember him for it too. Oh and thats a story for the Skating rink blog I'll do.

However it isn't Pearlin I remember the day that the Athletics Carnival for. Devii*, Hex* and Lizardbird* know as well as I do - Joe* was that reason. Even now i still have a soft spot in me for Joe* and his cheeky godlike smile. I don't know if he ever felt the same about me - I have been told that he once did... Eh.

I hope he never reads this because that would be embarrassing.

And Cazy if you read this - which you will - I have never acted on those old feelings and I love you wayyyy more. rofl.

Anyway Highschool brought to me a lot of people - Like Greg, Ray*, Rihcard, Sussie*, Kel*, Shelby*, Mamfa*... Etc.

It also seemed to take people away. Rest In Peace Stu, Matt and Rusty. You will forever be missed.

I gained and lost friends, boyfriends, crushes, classes, teachers... I miss that.

My last highschool Story is about Kwiz* but thats for another Blog.




Love all you peeps mentioned.



*Anyone marked with an asterix has had their name changed for security purposes. If you read this and you know that you are one of the people mentioned and you don't like your nickname please talk to me on MSN or via phone or email to change it.

STIFFY I know you hate this nickname but i couldn't think of any others that wouldn't give away your name. If you read this and you know one - please tell me.


Faithfully

AnniieMechaniical