I was given this by friend who was given it by a freind. It is hilarious and whoever made it has way too much time on their hands.
If You Gave Aragorn a Dr. Pepper
A/N: Okey-dokey! Here's this story!! Not sure where it came from, but oh well! smile
DISCLAIMER: I AM J.R.R. TOLKIEN REINCARNATED IN THE BODY OF A SPASTIC TENNAGER!! ALL SHALL BOW BEFORE ME WHEN I TAKE OVER THE WORLD WITH ENTS AND TERMINATORS WITH POM POMS AND TOMMY GUNS!! AND NINJA MONKEYS AND SHINY THINGS AND CHEESITS, COURTESY OF SHADOW929'S IMAGINARY FRIEND BOB!! AND ANIMAL CRACKERS, TRAINED BY SHADOW929!! AMONG OTHER VARIOUS ITEMS!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! What? I'm not Tolkien?! Oh... never mind, I don't own it! smile
Ahem... okay, I'm better now! Here's my story! smile
The warriors would soon be in a sea of orcs, and all the life jackets were taken. They would surely perish in this stupid idea of Aragorn's!
"Aragorn!" Legolas yelled, "The warriors need a rousing speech so they will fight instead of running away like pansies!"
"So sue me!"
"ARAGORN!!"
Alright, I'm going!"
Aragorn came up to the warriors and said:
"OKAY! So, here we are and we probably won't live much longer!"
The warriors stared at their leader, dumbfounded.
"Stare"
See? I told you!
"BUT! When life gets you down, you know what you gotta do?"
Perplexed, they shook their heads slowly.
"Shaking heads slowly"
OOH!! Two in a row! BEAT THAT!!
(Starts to sing) "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming! What do we do? We swim, swim, swim!!"
"Aragorn..."
"OH, HO HO HO, I LOVE TO SWIM-"
"ARAGORN!!"
"Huh?"
"WE ARE ABOUT TO BATTLE, LIKE, A BAJILLION ORCS AND YOU'RE SINGING!!"
"... Yeah!"
"AND WE'RE NO WHERE NEAR WATER!! HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO SWIM IF WE ARE NOWHERE NEAR WATER?!"
"Oh... Just keep fighting, just keep fighting, just keep fighting, fighting, fighting! What do we do? We fight, fight, fight!!"
"Aragorn, have you completely lost your MIND?!"
"No, Pippin just gave me some Hobbit drink! It's called, um...what was that called, Pip?"
"Dr. Pepper!" Pippin answered.
"Oh NO!!" Legolas moaned.
"Hey, Legolas! You want some?"
"Is there enough for us?" Asked the Rohan guys.
"Yeah! I got, like fifty bajillion cases of it, so help yourselves!"
"Sweet!"
When the orcs finally got to the field (They had run into the Dead Marshes somehow and had to go around), they were surprised to find all the warrior people screaming and running around in circles! The orc army stood staring at the scene for about 5 minutes without anyone seeming to notice. Finally, Aragorn saw them and gave a shout, getting everyone's attention.
"FOR FRODO... AND DR. PEPPER!!"
And with that, they charged down the field.
The End
A/N: Well, what did I tell you? Stupidness! Well, review anyways, please! smile
Namaarie, mellyn nin!
SNAITF
Soi of the abyss Community Member 
|
|
