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elves
i just finished the first chapter of my book YEAH! thunbs up to myself lolz but yah here it is, please tell me wut u think... oh yah and if u have comments on how it could be better dont hesitate to be brutaly honest, but here it is:



Insanity

Ch.1 just a normal day


The sound of rain was once again heard. It poured down like a nonstop shower as it always had. There she was sitting all alone like always. As if like a repeated play in the same theatre, he sat by her. He put his hand on top of hers, as if to comfort her.
Out of nowhere there was a loud beeping. It was a constant sound, annoying as well. As soon as the sound hit his eardrum he sprung up. Now he looked around and the environment was different. This new place was his room. David slapped the alarm button off and slithered his way off of his bed. He searched for clothes and walked upstairs, and down the hall like a zombie. He tapped on the door to check if anyone was occupying the bathroom. Rewarded with silence he stepped in.
After he was done taking his morning shower, he would get ready for another boring day of high school. He had a lot of time in the mornings before the bus came. Sometimes he always had time to check his e-mails, which was almost routine to pass time. He always had someone to talk to in the mornings. John was usually whom he talked to for about ten or twenty minutes before it was time to wait outside for the “Boredom Transit” as he referred to the bus.
It was snowing outside. It started snowing about a week ago. As the bus screeched to a halt to pick David up he forgot he left his computer on. He didn’t have time anyway. As he got on he fell asleep almost instantly.
As the bus rode up through the front of the school he was awaken by the squeal of the door. It was always disappointing to wake up here. His day of boredom would begin. He had always met up with John in the morning.
“Hey, man!” John said running up to him. “Hey.” David replied tiredly.
“Slept on the bus again?” “Yeah. So how is Malcum?”
“He should be all right. His paw has improved a lot.”
“That’s good. After all he is like the coolest dog I’ve ever seen.” The bell rang and that meant class was about to start.
“I’ll see you at lunch I guess.” John said running upstairs
After what seemed like forever, the lunch bell had finally rung. He found the table he usually sat at. The table was empty with the exception of himself and John. Usually the table was full and talkative. Today was dull. A topic suddenly arose from David’s head.
“Hey. I had that dream again.” He whispered. “You mean with the rain, in the park, and Jackie?”
“Yeah that’s the one.”
“Wow, that’s the third time now.”
“Yes, I know. I think it’s really weird. I know I like her but I’ve never said anything about it to her.” he looked back at Jackie's table. As always she was conversing with Jenny, her best friend. The lunch bell had gone off; meaning the second best part of the day was over. As soon as David and John had gotten up, Jackie, Jenny, and Laura had all just passed by them. David couldn’t help but stare at Jackie.
Now it was fourth period, his favorite fart of the day. It was not only a fun class but he sat in the back. And the wall to his left was a giant window. The building was U like shaped, with the exception of the fact there were two right angles. It was more like a rectangle without its top. Not only was this his favorite class because the teacher was pretty cool, but he always looked out of the window and just daydreamed.
There was a courtyard outside, and he always looked at the fountain. But the thing that he loved most about this class, and any part of the day, was the fact that Jackie was in the part of the building parallel to him. She sat next to the window/wall as well. He always got to see her. Usually he had window conversations with her, or they put notes up to the window.
He looked at her, and she must have seen him in her peripheral. She looked back up at him. David just stared at her. He looked into her eyes. She seemed to be doing the same thing though he couldn’t tell. She looked to the front of her classroom quickly. He sighed, and saw her talking looked like almost yelling. She must have been caught by the teacher, and was yelled at for not paying attention. Her teacher was pretty mean and crabby anyway.
She laid her head down on her desk. She looked sad. Well, she always looked sad. He continued to stare at her and daydream. He wished he could make her happy. He had always liked her. No he loved her. She was so beautiful to him.
He loved her eyes the most. They were a bluish gray, and he always loved staring into them.
He barely ever paid attention in class but Mr. Bronze always looked at test work more than homework. He was pretty funny, and he always had an Einstein getup. It kind of made sense, being an algebra/science class teacher. He was the best teacher of all his classes because of his sense of humor.
The bell finally rang, and David gathered his things up. Once again he looked through the window. Jackie looked so depressed. She glanced at him and tried to look a little less sad and left the classroom.
“Alright she’s gone, kid now go home.” Mr. Bronze joked with a short laugh. He knew David a little. He talked to him a lot after class. He knew David had feelings for her. David smiled a little and then left the classroom. He was outside waiting for the buses and he saw Jackie. Jenny walked up to her, so he decided to wait for the bus instead of talk to her.
On his trip home all that invaded his mind was her. As soon as he got home his mom called for him. “How was school?” she asked curiously. “Eh, it was boring as usual.”
“Ah.” She replied. David was just about to go downstairs when his mother said “Oh yeah tonight is scrounge night, so your going to have to find something for yourself.” “Ok.” He replied and finished his way down to his room. He just forgot that his computer was still on, until he saw it on. He put his backpack down beside his bed, and plopped down on it for a little while.
He heard his computer make a sound. Someone had messaged him. Knowing that he got up from his bed and went over to check whom it was. It was John. David typed in a response and right after he replied to John, Jackie had logged on. ‘Hi how are you?’ she said. ‘I’m doing alright’ he replied. John had replied, but David ignored him for a while. ‘That’s good.’
He got up and got his MP3 out to listen to it. ‘Yeah, I guess’ he typed. ‘How about you?’
‘Could be better’ she replied.
‘Yeah, so I’m guessing the teacher saw you looking out of the window today?’ ‘Yeah… but oh well she’s always crabby anyway. And old.’ “I could agree with that.” David said to himself. She put on a web cam. She had a white tank top on and her dirty blond hair was halfway in her face, like always. The back of her hair was in a bun. He thought she looked so beautiful.
David was getting hungry so he got up, and went upstairs to see what he could find. His mom was in her room, he noticed. She was probably reading. He searched the fridge. He saw a lot of things to eat, but he didn’t feel like making something. He went back downstairs and barged into the trunk he had near his bed. There was a box of crackers and some cheese in the mini fridge.
He grabbed that and went back to his computer desk. The black screensaver was on. That was funny, because it usually took about fifteen minutes for it to appear. He moved the mouse and the screen flickered a little. The screen finally came on, but it wasn’t better. The screen was now all static, making the computer screech. The static was constant for a while then it blinked once or twice and stayed again. He hit the screen twice and it blinked again, this time the static was gone.
What was now on the screen was not his message screen, or his desktop. It was a room with all its walls padded, like an insane asylum. It wasn’t just a picture it was a video. It had the red dot that said REC. next to it in the bottom corner. The walls had little blotches of what looked like red paint. David sat there and stared at the screen. He squinted at it and tapped the screen. Nothing happened.
He was just about to get his mom, when the blinked with static once, then again. When the final slide of static was gone something new was added to the already weird video. There was someone sitting in the middle of the room it’s back was turned and he was hidden. The camera seemed to be a security cam or something. From the looks of it, it was in the top left corner of the room.
The man got up, but in a strange way. He got up like he had no arms. He turned around. The way he did was horrifying. Hid head did not turn, only his body. This man was in a straight jacket with spots of blood on it, and everywhere else on his body. Finally his head twitched around slowly. David stared, horrified. He was scared frozen, and couldn’t move.
His face was bandaged except for one eye; which seemed to be stitched shut. The bandages were somewhat worn and old with bloodstains as well. He finally gave a twisted smile. Static flashed and the man was gone. Once more did the static pop on and off. His face was now covering the screen. David stared, and he was frozen still. He made a groaning sound, yet it didn’t come from the speakers, but from his own room. The screen was now drowned in static. Then shortly after the static was gone, revealing his message screen.
David was shaking, and freaking out in his mind. He tried to comfort himself saying it was probably something from the Internet, sent by one of his friends to make his day more interesting. He paid more attention to the screen with Jackie's web cam. She was gone. David’s eyes widened. He was now sweating, and kept on sending messages saying ‘Jackie? Where are you?’ or ‘Are you there.’
“No, no, no, no.” he repeated in his head at first then out loud. He turned around in his chair and put both hands on his forehead, and his fingers through his hair. His computer reassured that there was a reply. David jumped, a little of the unexpected sound. He was scared to turn around, but slowly he did. When he looked at the screen he let out a huge sigh of relief and comfort. She was in her chair in the cam, and she was sipping on some soda.
She read the message and giggled a little. She started typing. Seconds later the message appeared on David’s screen: ‘Wow, your anxious. I just told you that’d I’d be right back.’ David scrolled up and indeed there it was. ‘Oh, sorry. I just got the thing you sent me. That really was a scare.’ He typed. She was typing back. ‘What are you talking about?’ she replied.
‘Nothing’ he sent. David was kind of confused and scared again. He huffed. “Must have been John.” He told himself. He messaged John, asking him about the video with the insane guy. ‘What are you talking about?’ John typed back.
‘Dude, you got me. Don’t worry I’m not mad. Its kind of funny now.’
‘Seriously, man. I have no clue what you are talking about.’ David replied ‘I have to go.’ And sent the same message to Jackie. Straight after he turned the computer off, and just laid there in his bed staring at the cieling. It wasn’t “kind of funny” anymore.






User Comments: [5] [add]
ThE PoLiTiCaL DiSoRdEr
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Fri Dec 21, 2007 @ 06:09pm
vry vry good dear.
i love it


commentCommented on: Sat Dec 22, 2007 @ 06:41am
Hmm, that Jackie reminds me of Jaci. =]



DeathByMisadventure
Community Member
DeathByMisadventure
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commentCommented on: Sat Dec 22, 2007 @ 08:43pm
Nevermind. ;3
Now I know who that Jackie is, that one political order girl.


commentCommented on: Sun Dec 23, 2007 @ 04:49am
...



shake the dust
Community Member
Try To Escape This Fate
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commentCommented on: Tue Jan 08, 2008 @ 01:24am
This sucked so much i want to cry!
Just kidding man, it was good mrgreen


User Comments: [5] [add]
 
 
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