Okay, so today at school I gave Trevor a hand-sewn bag I made with candy in it, and a stuffed toy cow. It's about the size of his small fist, and when you pull on it's tail it... vibrates. NO IT'S NOT A DIDLO. Anywho, things were going fine, I made him happy- and then after school when Lea goes to pet him he's all "AAACK- oh it's okay. Whew! I thought you were Cari." I just died a little inside. x.-
SO YEAH. It kills me that he crushes on my best friend and he's scared of me. I know I brought it on myself, but I just happen to NOT be shy. Is that such a crime, really? No, I think not. Trevor's all "YOU ONLY RANT AT ME AND GLOMP ME AND WAH WAH WAH"
Eck.
He's just so cute I can't even stand it! I feel like an idiot but then I don't but then I do, because he should just shut up and love me but then I think, "Cari, you're not in a darn fairytale, you don't want to be in one." I'm so stupid! Here I go acting all insecure which is WAY too cliche, writing in an idiotic journal no one will ever read, writing poor run-on sentences with grammatical errors. WHY AM I POSTING THIS ONLINE AND USING CAPS? I don't know. I really don't know. I just need somewhere to rant. It's not really like anyone will ever actually READ this... like someone's going to randomly look up my journal. Yeah, right. I don't have links to it anywhere. Screwy.
I'M JUST A WHINY LITTLE TEENAGER WHO NEEDS MEDICATION. Go away. Stop reading this. This is boring, bleak, un-informative writing. It's an eyesore. Go read a novel. O.o
There's a rock puppy on top of this journal... why do I even TRY to love Trevor?!? ERGH! This is odd. I feel like a N00B. Oh well, this is the privacy of my journal. Well nothing on the internet is really private, but only a person without a life would bother to read this. Trevor trevor trevor... it shall never work and that is sad. Maybe if I hadn't have told him I liked him, hugged him, told him I'd always be by his side... he's one of the luckiest guys in the world, but he doesn't think so. I can't stop giving him affection now... it's like a drug! I get high off of it! If that's what "love" is, there you have it. Honestly I don't think love exists, even though I use the word like I do. I just say it, but really all that exists is chemistry, lust and physical attraction. That, and friendship. When you get those mixed, apparently love comes out of the deal. Why the Hell am I dissecting a word?!? This is really stupid. Oh well. I have no clue what I should do. Yay. XP
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Convoluted Logic
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