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confused i'm so confused. question lord, i need da strength from somewhere.
first i've completely given up on da guy i was tryin get wit (terry) cuz at first he wasn't ready for another girlfriend which was cool wit me cuz i can live wit just bein friends but almost everytime we chill we end up messin wit each other n makin each other all hot n bothered n now he's talkin bout gettin back wit his exgirlfriend who none of his friends approve of n my female best friend(esha)'s sister (who is married) keeps tryin to see him which is not good cuz last time she tried to have sex wit him n he was like no. eek eek eek
second i've met dis guy named k.d. biggrin n he is so sweet n da sex is good but everytime i've seen him we've had conversation in da car n den sex at his appartment. i don't no what to call our relationship n i don't like assumin stuff either. we text each other all da time but we hardly ever actually talk more than once a week. i no his real name n fav color n fav kind of music n where he's from n his gangsta history. i no his tattoos n dat he used to mix cds n dat he has a hat collection. i don't want to label da relationship we have cuz i don't like to assume things but my estrogen must b takin over cuz all of a sudden i need to no what dis is so i gotta find da strength to ask him to label all this. confused confused confused
third my male best friend since 8th grade(miguel aka mijo) said somethin to esha(my female best friend) about havin old feelins for someone she sees everyday. now she's all like "it's u it's u." so of course my old feelins for him flare up n now i got more confusion added in. esha keeps sayin "it's u". n i keep sayin "did he name me?" n she's like "no but who else do i see everyday from back in da day? i don't see sheila n karen as much cuz i don't live wit them anymore. jasmine gets on his nerves. janelle lives out churchland so i no i don't see her besides she just came back from college in carolina. it's has to b u. i see everyday. hell i live wit ur a**!!!" n she got real mad when i said "he could b talkin u. don't u see urself everyday in da mirror?" n on n on. anyway now my on-again-off-again crush on mijo is on again n i blame da subliminal message sent by esha n once again i say dat i don't like assume things. if he was someone i didn't no well i'd walk up to him n just ask him but i do no him i never said n-e-thin to me so wat can i do? cry cry cry crying crying crying idea idea idea OH YEAH DID I FORGET TO ADD DA FACT THAT HE HAS FREAKIN GIRLFRIEND FROM WHEN HE WAS IN DA AIRFORCE?????????? idea idea idea i don't do homewreckin so c'est la vie... crying crying crying
scream scream scream maybe i just need to breathe n kick everyone's butt......... ninja ninja ninja ninja ninja