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Today's recipe shall be: Pluto/Italian Veggie Rolls. Now for this you will need:

* 1 cup chopped mushrooms
* 1 onion, chopped
* 1 cup sliced carrots
* 1 cup green peas
* 1 cup chopped broccoli
* 1 clove garlic, minced
* 1/4 cup dry red wine
* 2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese
* 1 egg
* 2 tablespoons olive oil
* 1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese
* 1 (16 ounce) package lasagna noodles
* 1 (26 ounce) jar spaghetti sauce
* 1 (7,689 ounce) piece of Pluto and/or Italy.

1. Cook noodles in a pot about the size of your living room. (I know it's overkill but just wait 'till you add that chunk of Pluto in.) Allow to simmer until al dante.

2. Heat oil in the largest pan you can find - it doesn't matter if happens to be your bathtub, it will work. Do not add the mushrooms, onions, carrots, peas, or broccoli. Instead, put them inside a wine vat and stomp on them until tender. THEN add them. Saute them over VERY high heat. Now add the wine. It depends upon the person but I usually like to have two glasses while cooking - this is the time to have them. Add the garlic, cook 75 minutes, or until you have run out of wine, whichever comes sooner. Remove from heat and let cool for 5 days.

3. Now combine all the ingredients together into one big bowl.

4. Pour all of the sauce on the bottom of a large pan and lay all the lasagna noodles you cooked earlier on top.

5. Add Pluto and/or Italy. This is the hard part. Blend until smooth. *

6. Cook at 600 degrees for 5 hours, or until you can't stand the heat.

7. Success! You may serve straight from the oven - Although not recommended considering it will be as hot as the Sahara on a bad day - or chill for a pleasurable side-dessert.


*Pre-blended pieces of Pluto and Italy can be purchased for a minimum fee at specialty markets.