Ok it is affical. I hate the people here they suck a** and they need some serious help sicotic help!!! you know who really gets on my nerves....georga hayley catlin and pretty much all of the other girls on the volleyball team except for chelsea rose and tika. omg this weekend was horrible i mean horrible like so horrible it was unbeleavible and everybody got pissed at me for being happy in the morning. is it like im supposed to be tired in the morning just like everybody else and be a b***h ummm sorry no not today and hello people we have a game in 10 minutes get your a** in gear or i will for u!!!! scream scream it pisses me off i mean like really really really pisses me off. and the whole intire time we drove out to revolstoke we listened to spice girls...brittney spears first cd......jessica sipmson all that mushy mushy crap. we didnt listen to rock rap nothing at all. hayley is such a b***h I HATE U HAYLEY......
this weekend just put so much stress on me it not even funny....im in pain so much pain....they complain about a bruised near or they might have arthritis but they will never know what i go through....never know and nobody will.....sometimes i just wanna well out "leave me along u stupid ******** dont touch me or i fall and die and everbody will blame u so ******** off"
but u know i just cant because im a "happy cheery person that everbody loves" ******** that did it ever come to your mind that it was all ******** fake
!!! i guess not!!!
and i think my shoulder just popped out ok maybe not anyway on with my rant.............
life sucks my dad is being a** which is kinda hard to believe cause he lives all the way on the other side of the province.... oh but wait he has always been an a** it was his fault he wanted to stay in vancouver and not give a s**t that i was turning 6 in three fricken days and gonna have a big party well no that never happened i didnt have a birthday that year not a single present not even a single "happy birthday jessie" not from my friends not even from my own ******** family........
it just went down hill from there..........that night......that scared me soo bad and it still does i was so young and so was my brother...he didnt know what was going on i did once the told me.......they blamed me...every single person in this town blamed me...it was my fault all my fault not anybody's elses but mine.....i was only 7...well ******** them all...why me
every time something bad happens i get flashbacks and they are not friendly i mean not freindly at all......the pain i go through but i am strong stupid little remarks like when a friend is mad at you they start bitching at you i shrug it off cuase frankly it dont mean anything to me i really dont care what u say about me i dont care if you try to kick my a** you will be sorry. u ******** with me...your life will be hell.....GOd i need to get out of this place.....i actually wouldnt mind going back to a foster but then they feel soo sad for you and i really dont need pity.
And why the ******** am i just ranting on about this oh yes i remeber cuase nobody reads this anyway so i can just say what i want to say and if ya do read this take a long hard look at your life and just think "i have a good life" and all your heartache will dispear like it does in fairytales....
ha not true
later
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Haioneene
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