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So idk, I havent posted any blogs or such in like forever. I guess coz I havent been online all that much and even when I am I just sit here staring at the screen mostly. But I just feel so bleh lately. Idk. Im still living at home when I would much rather be out. I'm on break from uni til August 6, and I'm soooo tired of applying for jobs and getting nowhere with them. Although fingers crossed for my job interview tomorrow. I guess the bigges thing that has me bleh is finding out, yet again, I had been lied to be someone I deeply cared about. And now I think she can just go jump because Im tired of dealing with her bullshit (great friend, huh?). And then theres the guy I want more than anything atm, who has a gf, and hes a really good friend, and Ive barely spoken to him since his girls been back in the state and Im like ACK coz it just sucks. And what makes it worse is that I know he isnt happy and doesnt really think he wants to be with her anymore. Not that it matters for me anyways, because I dont have a chance. Which doesnt so much bother me, because so long as he's happy I dont really care. But its like... Idk. Hes probably my best friend and I havent had him to talk about all this stuff bugging me and its getting me down and yeah. Blaaaah. Cant wait for her to leave again. or him to just end it for good, either one works for me. Actually, if he ends it that ones better coz then he has a huge burden off his shoulders and he isnt all bleh anymore and yeah. Anyways. Im tired. And rambling, as I do. Im going to sleep. Or to play some stupid game or other. Who knows.