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-Chapter 1-
I was walking home from my origami club at school. I don't live too far, so i can take my time. I was half way home when a man in my neighborhood came up to me. I didn't recognize him, he must of been new to the town. He comes up and asks,
"Excuse me, could you help me with something?"
I looked at him with happy eyes but worried expression. "'m sorry, i need to get home. I'm late as it is."
"So it doesn't matter any way right?" He points to his house. " I just need you to see if there's a pipe broken. m too big to get down there. Your already late." As right as he was, i gave up fighting with him and sighed. " Where is it, I guess I can take a look."
"Just around the back. The only window close to the floor." He said, moving his hand to show me directions. I go towards the back yard, i turn and hes not fallowing me. He must of gone in to get something. I'm at the back where there is not yard. All there was, was a small patio with a set of stairs leading to the walk way, leading to the front yard.
I look around and there was no window, no windows at all. "Sir, i cant find any windows. Can you..." It went dark, i couldn't see a thing. I tried to get the thing covering my face off, but something, or someone, was holding my arms. I tried yelling, but there was a hand covering my mouth. Then, i was being carried. I tried to kick them, but i couldn't move my legs.
I was tossed into a hollow room. I took the bag off my head and ran for the exit, but the door closed on me. "Let me out Please! Someone help me!!" I yelled, pounding on the walls, nothing worked. The room started to move, i heard a noise, like and engine starting. Then i realized, i was in a truck. "Let me out, please someone help!!"
"Keep it down in there!" A man with a deep voice yells. No one can hear you, so shut up! Or I'll get my buddy in there to teach you a lesson." I look around, there was a little bit of light coming from the holes that were drilled in, in case there were fruit or animals. I hear a step coming from a corner.
"What a pretty girl... It would be a shame to hurt you." said a voice that seemed so un-human. "Why do you have to yell? I wont hurt you."
"Stay away from me!" I said, crying my eyes out.
"Awww, don't be like that..." A shimmering light gleams at me, he had a knife. "Stay away, I.. I mean it!" I tried to get back, as far back as i could. But i was trapped in a corner. He stops and kneels in front f me with the hand holding the knife, resting on his knee. "You really are pretty. you know?" He puts his hand on my cheek, rubbing away any tears that had escaped my eyes. "Lovely blue eyes as well, I think your the only blue eyed girl I have seen yet."
"What are... are you going to do to me?" I tried to be cool, not show to much fear, but the tears kept coming.
"Well, I'm not going to do anything to you, as long as your quiet." He removes his hand from my face and sits with his legs folded, with both hands holding the knife. "So, whats your name? He said with a very disturbing, yet friendly smile. I stayed quiet. I curled up in a ball up against the corner with my arms holding the walls.
"I asked you a simple question. The least you can do is answer it." He said, his face going angry, Non-patient. I still stayed quiet, hoping that he'd just leave me alone. But he wouldn't stop staring. He stands up, puts he knife in its sheath. He stood up, Frowns, and starts beating me. He kept beating me and beating me, i asked many times to stop but he wouldn't. "I don't like it when girls don't answer me!"
"My names Alice!!!" I said crying non stop. Bleeding every where from head to elbow. He stops, panting really heard. " What a pretty name. Never met a pretty girl, with a pretty name."
He holds up my chin with his index finger, looks me in the eyes and says. "I'll tell you something that will help you in the future, Alissss." He said, with a extended hiss. "if you don't do or answer what they tell you, your going to be in a lot of pain more then what your in now." The truck stopped, leaving a screeching noise echoing through the room. I heard slamming coming from the front. The door leading to where i was opened. Bright light shined through out the room.
A man taller, stronger than the last, comes up to me. He smiles, and with a very sinister voice he says. "We're here!"
- by Precious Wonderer |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 03/23/2011 |
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- Title: Dangerous Love -Chapter 1-
- Artist: Precious Wonderer
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Description:
This is a story i started writing just for fun. But when people started reading it, they all said i should type it and see what others think. So i decided to put it on here and get you opinions.
Please leave a comment~:heart: - Date: 03/23/2011
- Tags: dangerous love
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Comments (2 Comments)
- Precious Wonderer - 03/26/2011
- Ya ^.^;; I need to better with that. + i need to do better with my grammer.
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- Deathcake J - 03/23/2011
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It's terrifying! I think the story has great potential, even though it freaks me out and isn't my type of thing. >^.^< It has some technical issues though, nothing you can't fix easily. Comment space requires me to be brief, so, if you want a more in-depth explanation PM me!
Narratives should be in past tense for reading continuity. Tell a story that already happened, not one that is currently happening.
Write in a word processor so you can spell/grammar check, and proof read. >^.^< - Report As Spam