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{My insane thoughts say so, exactly in the inane order they were written. } I would never say I understand, though I'm not sure I don't. I however am a coward. I could never place myself in a position to die. I am not an advocate of hate. I do not know how people can truly hate. It seems so beyond me that there is never anyway for be there. I apply incredible definitions to both love and hate though. But there will always be someone who cares for you. I'm sure there are those whom care for me. Even when it seems like there is no one, either around, whom care, or at least doesn't hate, there is. Now as for any feelings about dying, I've had those. Whenever I'm there, I can usually get through it by confessing my sorrows in silence to the shadows. But when that doesn't work, I have no choice but to continue to play happy. Even when I've been really depressed, and incredibly full of sorrow, I had the horrible ability to mask it so nobody would know. I have a number of unhealthy habits. In fact I have given into the idea that I will likely die cold, alone, and unloved, but I will still try to make everyone else beleive I'm just as happy as I ever was. You on the other hand needn't feel that way. There is absolutely no reason for you to feel bad, hated, abandoned, or lack the will to life. I may not have know you very long, but I think I might know enough. You will always have freinds. You will find someone whom will care for you. I cannot say you will find love. That only you will ever know. But you will at least be able to find someone who cares for you more than anyone else you know, and that will be with you always. At least that is my hope. And there is nothing about you that would give me reason to believe otherwise. May life always be kind to you, or at least will you always be able to find kindness. Your sorrow should never prevent you from being happy. Because you're happiness will be keys to another's. May any tears you shed have only be from laughter. Let those from sadness never reach you.

You stand and fight and face your problems.
never back down and keep your head up.
you will then accomplish what you had planned to do from the start
^_^