I've been doing a lot of thinking over the holidays. Some good, some bad. Things are going to be different around home. I knew this when I helped my mother with the decision to leave my father, but the overbearing sense of change has only been augmented with the onset of the Christmas 'morrow. The subtle pain is becomming more clear like a crystal in the brightest light. As I sit here listening to music I realize again that I've hurt people through out this year without meaning to. It was never my intention to do that and I hope those people will forgive me. I know I'm not the easiest person to live with, especially around this time when I don't even understand myself. And I'd just like to say that I'm sorry. It seems that I'm feeling the pain even more now that the holidays are upon us. Honestly, I just want to lay on my bed and cry myself to sleep. That would be a blessing considering I haven't been sleeping well at all. I won't even mention my sleeping hours due to the fact people would be breaking into my house and forcing sleeping aids downt my throat. sweatdrop Yes, I know that you guys would do it.
Anyway, I'll save my thoughts for another time. Merry Christmas, everyone.
 Karidys · Sat Dec 25, 2004 @ 06:51am · 2 Comments |
