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ah yes i have been enlightened by my dear friend raveh about the gothic culutre more than i was before. and also many people tend to turn the gothic society as outcasted as odd and sometimes sexual. take the gothic lolita style parents and society think they are going back to years of youth. though it might seem that way, but all it is just to be elegant and mistyic about things. also to the term "kinderwhore" im not a kinderwhore i dont run around on porn sites being slutty no way. its just elegance my reader. i causally wear black but my mother forbids me to wear certain things because she wants me to fit into society. well does she know that society is corrupt as we know it? i mean many people are becomming pop culture obsessed and its going into mainstream. who knows what will happen years from now. personaly i think my whole outlook on life changes. i feel that where i live i am restricted of being myself. i read and write and paint to keep the sanity that i still posses. I plan to move out when im 18 to san fran so i may be in touch with my roots and such. but i also wish to live in tokyo since its so nice there or shizuoka. its very peacefull...i really miss japan, i felt i could really be myself there i wish i could paint a picture of shizuoka like the painting on my wall the mayor gave me. such a peacefull town and there i could enjoy the calmness of it and be with my koi forever