I seem to find myself walking down the first darkened alleyway of this new year... well... at least... this first alleyway away from teenagedom... and I cant seem to shake it... I havent felt this way for a while either...
I dont even know whats causing it... cept for maybe lonliness... which i really wouldnt put too far past it.... stress even... -sighs-... bitter news....
Lonliness might be the primary cause... but even then... its never been this bad... for a good long time... and I've felt lonlier.... I made a new friend up here.... my roomie heather... but even then... with her there... i feel even more like... I ahve to put on a happy face and bear it all... i managed to break free of one mask... but here i go slipping behind another one... and this one is concealing alot more...
it could be that... in addition to stress... while my grades in psychology are going up... they're not anywhere near where I want them to be... I mean... come on... I got a low c on my last test... and thatwas the highest thus far... -suighs and puts her head in hands- ... I got a job on top of that... and have more credits next block.... at least the job is only 15 hours a week...
for those who dont know... I'm a math tutor now.... 5 days a week...but yeah... -sighs-....
when will the path alight a new for me to walk... so I dont have to walk alone in this heavy darkness that plagues my heart?....
 Marion-san · Fri Jun 02, 2006 @ 05:46am · 2 Comments |
