I can hear the church bells from down the street aways. They're really pretty-sounding, but it still makes me feel more lonely.
It's Easter. Those that didn't leave yesterday because they have family in Muncie have gone home for the day to celebrate. Probably by eating ham and yelling racial slurrs at passersby as seems to be the local custom. Mom and dad are back in South Bend, trying to put up with Aunt Wendy's incessent gibberish and Maddie's constant attempts to be the center of attention. Pocky, Cait, Bree, Jamie, and Courtney are all at their respective places trying to answer all the questions their relatives keep throwing at them. "What's college like?" "Do you like your professors?" "What are you taking next semester?" As if they are genuinely interested. Jason is on a bike trip to some French-named town. LaPorte or LaFayette or one of those. Rookie is out with Rocky, who is probably fondling her good-ums. Bill is with his new family: his frat brothers. He sends these words of wisdom: "Stay in school. But not for more than four years." Everyone else on campus that knows me doesn't seem to want to talk to me. I think they get the impression that I'm an attention whore. Or a third-wheel. Or a loser.
So that's where everyone else is. Where is Lee? In her dorm room typing this emo-laden journal entry about how she's all lonely and crap while listening to Styx and working on four simultaneous projects (in theory). I know it's not their fault for leaving me alone, family is important. It's just that more and more I get this itching feeling that I'm being taken for granted. "Oh... Lee'll be there. She's always there." Always in the Noyer Lobby. Always by herself. Always there.
And of course, Hans left Gaia yesterday. She was one of the first people I met when I joined. So of course this depresses me. And I was already pretty depressed to begin with. And I don't know if I should keep the stuff she gave me because it might make me more depressed.
She seemed kind of happy about leaving. .________.
 Gethsemane · Sun Apr 16, 2006 @ 06:35pm · 0 Comments |
