• i feel faded lately,
    so i've been dressing in gray.
    i'm in mourning for what's not quite gone,
    but something that was never really there.
    you tell me i glow, the same as you,
    as if you knew how bright you were.
    a galaxy telling an ember that they are bright is no more comforting than it is insulting.
    but when stars mean well, what can you say?
    how can they hear you when they're so far away?
    these rhetorical questions clutter up my mind
    loose-leaf flyers of bygone ideas and whiny pinings for what could have been
    when what is stares me in the face.

    i feel belligerent lately,
    so i've been picking fights.
    i'm angry at nothing in particular,
    but no more at myself than usual.
    you tell me you care, the same as me,
    as if you knew how much i cared.
    a feeling that runs so deep that the thought of escaping it is as frustrating as it is tempting.
    but what can one say on matters of the heart?
    when we're together with others, we'll always be apart.
    these guilt tripping ramblings pour out of my soul
    emotional baggage too heavy to check and lip service for all i could do
    when what i don't taps its foot, undone.

    i feel cold lately,
    so i've been staying in bed.
    i'm afraid at the words you've said,
    that you'd drop me when i stop glowing.
    i tell you i smolder, the same as i've been,
    as if i could know if i've changed or not.
    a child with words telling a muse that they are an inspiration is tired as it is complementing.
    but when one gets told that every day,
    what do the same words even say?
    these repetitive pleas for things not needed
    bright people who surround us and are real to the touch
    when who you're with makes you shine brighter than i ever can.