• There's a really, really...
    Really, really, really boring program
    On my television set right now...
    Ahhhhhhh, but God damn!

    The remote's on the couch
    And I am way across the room...
    WTF? Why have I been cursed
    To such a horrible doom?

    God knows I'm to way too lazy to
    Get up and go and get it... But...
    Bad shows like this make me insane
    In my membrane. Oh! what? what? What

    Am I to do? Call it a hunch,
    But I think very, very soon,
    If no one comes to help this man,
    He'll be as crazy as a loon.