Thought Of Death

• Artist: xXtorn_apart_heartXx
• Description: A poem I wrote in science class after I found out that my boyfriend cheated on my and when I asked him about it he lied when I already knew it was true.
• Date: 07/21/2009
• Tags: thought death

Life is dimming,
disappearing,
I'm lying on the ground.
Bullet in my head,
knife in my heart,
blood is all around.
My heart's in shreads,
I'm dieing inside,
though you were the one who told the lie.
My hands are cold,
I'm almost dead,
Now all I have to say is...goodbye

Comments

[StNecro]

it conveys your feelings pretty well, although the cause is quite blurry. the finale is fantastic.

[StNecro]

im sorry to say it, but thats overkill.

a bullet AND a knife puts you in danger of sounding ridiculous.
then, you make an allmost direct relation between the knife i your heart, and your heart being torn to shreds, as if the damage were physical.

allso, after describing the physical damage from your succesfull attempt at suicide, you say you are dieing inside, but, not yet dead, despite the bullet in your head.

[xXtorn_apart_heartXx]

wow bro u said the same thing to both of my posts =P

[Fck Ya Nikkas]

Ya go xXtorn_apart_heartXx. Hey everyone thats my sister. I don't have to read it to know it's good. I've read her writing before. 5 out of 5.