Great mystery of life

• Artist: Twizted_Trixta
• Description: the speed that life can change... the rapidity of the pains the follow.. the snail-paced healing...
• Date: 06/10/2009
• Tags: great mystery life

the speed that life can change...
the rapidity of the pains the follow..
the snail-paced healing...
the seeing the end but unable to stop it..
the knowing its all going to fall apart...
to watch it all unfold in a way that makes it all seem pointless..
and the slow and excruciating, almost everlasting pains that follow you even in death...
life can be horrible or it can be blissful..
tho we may not be able to change the end or the speed at which it all comes..
we can change how it will all happen..
the mystery though, is which choices make it better and which make it worse...
not all choices are or will be clear..
not all that seems right is...
that, is the great mystery of life....

Comments

[Branny_Bear]

and ur cute twizted

[Branny_Bear]

cuz he wants to

[Hiraetha]

Why don't you use line breaks or whitespace instead of the ellipses (...)?
The way you've formatted it makes it hard on the eyes, which increases the difficulty to read and try to comprehend what you're saying. Also, since the rest of your vocabulary is not old English, use 'though' instead of 'tho'. Also, the comma after 'that' in the last line is a punctuation error which distrupts the flow fo the sentance
You have a good idea and good theme, but your imagery and form need work. Two stars.