Dead

• Artist: likeicare11
• Description: Ok its a poem... idk if its good. It emotional and its about a emo girl. Its not me!!
• Date: 07/25/2008
• Tags:

She hust lay there
as dead as I am alive
I wonder If I could have stoped her,
made her not die.
I know that could never be
but still I saw her die
how could i have not helped?
So what I do
is just look over her frajile
broken body and weep,
tears faling down her yung white face
and weep, screem, and wonder
Will I be able to handle this?
The quesions and answers
there lay the gun...
should i be next
into the darkness I call home?
yes, i will be welcomed
give my regards to my mother.
*bang*

Comments

[Koukaikutsuu]

she is rite. u should

[Izzy of the Insane]

Try spellchecking it next time. Also, I think you should get rid of *bang* at the end. It's already implied that he killed himself, you don't need that there. Plus, it just doesn't look very good.

Other than that, I think it's...alright. It's a bit cliche...