Forgotten

• Artist: FireIsMyElement
• Description:
• Date: 04/26/2009
• Tags: forgotten

My shoes are silent on the floor and I ask myself
Do I want this anymore?
Do I want to sit here while he guilts me into submission?
Why am I always in the bad guy position?
Do I want to feel like I did something wrong?
No.
Do I love him?
I can't answer that.
While I sit in the shawdows he gets a pat.
Even now, the day of my birth, holds no candle to his naive football god.
Even now his apology is and only will be a whisper in my dreams
And now everyone sees

Comments

[XxxDARK_LEGENDxxX]

woww

[ThievingNihilism]

[pardon my french but] I think ProfesorKC can suck it, it's a very nice poem and i just love how true it is that guys tend to be oblivious as to what goes on around them and, not to be cheesy, but they almost seem not to care [even though girls do it too, but you get the point]

[sachiotaku]

aww this is nice.. smile

[Tentens Legacy]

Ahem.
BLOODY BRILLIANT.

[ProfessorKC]

<soft gigle> I did say nice attempt and went on to point out a mechanical deficiency in the poem whcih can be readily fixed and I do indeed complment what I see as done well or very well. There have been a few.and there is no shame in discovering a piece is still a work in progress. happens to me all the time! smile

[smartscs_twilight lover96]

dont listen to PROFESSORKC he is always puttin people down instead of supporting them . i love your poem and think it was good through and through

[ProfessorKC]

You start with a nice image of unmoving and noiselessness which describes indecision and stoic behavior quite nicely ... and it's the only image in the whole piece that works well. "Sit in shadows" is acceptable but over used. It can personify hiding, avoidance, but not so much being ignored. No one purposely stays in shadow if they want to be noticed.
Nice attempt.