• I stumbled upon two paths. I saw one of forgiveness and one of hatred. I have always known that hatred ate you up like a coiled snake, and forgiveness was a sign of strength and noble intent. I could never forgive myself for what I did to you that very day, but I could no longer stand the thought of facing the music and seeing it differently. I hated myself more every day. I could no longer face my own image. The thought of what I did to you was unspeakable, but I thought about it every day. All I wanted to do was, to go home and hold you in my arms. I tried over and over again, to come back, to say something, but I couldn’t. I was fearful of what you would say to me, how you would react. I am fearful of closing my eyes and seeing yours. Your eyes stole my heart and my soul the minute I laid eyes on you. I could never possibly imagine looking at them when they were full of so many unanswered questions, and so much hurt. I have always wanted to be there for you, and I have always wanted to make things right. But, so much time has passed and all I can think of is how much you have changed, and how you may have grown. I do not know why I have decided to stop and think about this now. After all these years you have waited, after all these changes, since the day I left. I now understand what they meant; by telling me I would regret this, how good I had it. I want to look in your eyes, and tell you I am truly sorry I am for not being there, or helping you, when you may needed it.


    By: Ashley M-R.