• I can see myself standing there. I’m in the middle of the kitchen talking on the phone with one hand, picking up a knife with the other.

    “Andy, I just can do it anymore.” I said into the phone, “I just can’t.” I put the phone on speaker and set it on the counter, “I’m sorry… I-” I started pressing the knife into my arms hard enough to start drawing blood. I was going to do it. I wasn’t afraid, “forgive me.”

    “Annie, what are you doing?” Andy asked worriedly.

    “I can’t take it anymore” Blood was flowing down my arms from the cuts I continued making, “Tell Ronny and Ninii and Pillow, and all them good bye for me, would you?”

    “I’m not saying goodbye to anyone for you because you’re not going to do this.”

    I cut deeper into my arms, “Andy I’m sorry. I just., I can’t take it anymore. I can’t take the pain anymore. I have to do this. I’m sorry.” Tears were streaming down my cheeks as I lifted the knife to my throat. “Forgive me.” I wince in pain as the knife begins to draw blood.

    “Annie, please stop. I’m begging you. Stop. You don’t want to do this. Stop.”

    “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.” I said as I pressed harder on the knife feeling the metal slicing and the blood dripping down into the puddle on the floor. “Forgive me.” I pressed the knife hard onto the side of my neck and slid it quickly across, the cold metal slicing through my skin.

    I let out a short scream as everything goes black and I fell on the floor into the puddle of blood forming on the floor. My blood.

    “Annie?”
    No answer.

    “Annie, answer me.”

    Still no answer.

    “Annie! *bleep* Mom! Text Amy right now! Have her call 911 and get an ambulance over to Annie’s house. Now!”

    Andy stayed on the phone in hopes that I would answer. I didn’t.

    It wasn’t long until the ambulance arrived. One of the paramedics saw the phone and picked it up, turned off speaker and said, “Do you know what happened?” Andy told him everything from what he knew had happened. “Alright. We’re going to take her to the hospital right now.”

    “Wait, what hospital?”

    “San Joaquin”

    “’Kay, thank you.”

    *click* He hung up the phone.

    Andy managed to contact Ronny.

    “Hello?” Ronny answered.

    “Hi, Ronny?” Andy asked.

    “Yeah, who’s this?”

    “My name is Andy, I’m a good friend of Annie’s.”