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As I sit in my cell I think to myself, “I’m going to die today.” I’ve known for years that the day would come that my life would end. After all, everyone dies. It’s a guarantee of being born. However, I never really expected it to end this way. As I sit here, I think back to that day, the day that ended my life.
When I was eighteen, I was considered a good girl. I attended all of my classes, made it to work on time, and helped around the house. I argued with my parents and was a little mouthy, but what teenager was any different? I came home from school that day, went to my room and started working on a paper due next class. My little sisters started knocking on my door asking for my DVD player, then my computer, then a pencil, then a book, on and on. It felt as though every five minutes my sisters found a new reason to bug me. I started to get annoyed. I needed to finish this paper for class. My sisters got bored and finally stopped, not ten minuets later my mom started, “Chrystina, go to the store. I need some scratch-off Lotto tickets”.
“Oh my God,” I thought, “of course you do!” So, I went to the convenience store to get her some. Because I knew that if I didn’t, she wouldn’t leave me alone! So, I got her five tickets. No sooner then I hand them to her, she scratched them. “Chrystina, I won. Go back and get some more,” she yelled. I went back four more times before I cracked, “This is just too much. My sisters bugging me, you sending me for Lotto tickets I’m done. I have a paper to write!” I start to yell. Mom, not understanding my annoyance, started to yell back. We yelled and argued for about ten minutes before I stormed out of her bedroom and went back to my own room. I locked my door and put my headphones on. I just needed to get away from it all. Tuning the music up loud, I drowned out the rest of the world. Eventually, I fell asleep.
I was awakened a short time later by my step-dad pounding on my door, telling me to unlock it. “Great, dealing with HIM is just what I need,” I think. I slowly get up to open my door. When I did, he started yelling at me for yelling at my mom and locking my door. He thinks since he has a badge and works at the jail he can threaten me. “If you don’t do what you are told, we can have you tossed in jail.” Or, he will say, “You are 18 year old now, you are not your mother’s and my responsibility anymore and I can throw you out at any time!” At this point, all reason was gone. My head was spinning and I was just so done! He went to his room, and I sat in mine waiting. At three o’clock I snuck into my parents’ room. I knew where my step-dad hid his gun. I knew how to load it. Ready, aim, fire. When I regained my senses I was back sitting on my bed, gun in my lap, blood on my hands, and my paper finished. I glanced up and saw the flashing lights and then I heard the sirens. When the cops came in, I didn’t struggle. I was arrested for the murders of Timothy Farrell, Kathy Farrell, Emily Strickland, and Kara Strickland.
Thinking back on it, I was so stupid. I should have told my mom I was stressed over the paper and that my sisters wouldn’t leave me alone. But I didn’t, and now I couldn’t. There was just nothing that I could do or say to change what was done. The guard came in and again I don’t struggle. She leads me down a hall and opens the door inside was “The Chair”. They strap me in and ask if I have any last words. I nod my head and say, “I’m sorry Mom, Dad, Emily, and Kara”. The executioner throws the switch.
They say as soon as you die you see your life flash before your eyes all of your good times all of your bad times. I didn’t. I saw how it would have been. I saw how my little sisters would have grown up and gone on to high school. I saw my self graduating from college and becoming a teacher like I had always dreamed. I also saw my mom standing in front of a class teaching well into old age. I even saw us all together at holidays and birthdays eating, laughing, and celebrating. But then, it all ended, and there was blackness.
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Title:
last day
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Artist:
PrettyLittleOrphanWhore
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Description:
i wrote this for my psych class a girl kills her family
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Date:
11/01/2009
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Tags:
lastday
death
murder
regret
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