• Even Ezra sweet crooning couldn’t soothe the savage beast that threatened to rip my heart to shreds.
    Was it true, did I just fall in love?
    Love at first sight. Especially with a guy who makes corny d**k jokes.
    That couldn’t be possible. I love Paul. The incredibly sexy senior, who can’t even remember my name. Paul, the guy who I spoke to, and he even said “hay” and smiled. So different from what usually get.
    That is silence. Maybe I don’t speak loud enough to be heard or maybe they just don’t care to hear. But I’m sure I love Paul.
    What is my dream? To dance with Paul of course at least once, and then for him to lean down and tell me that he wanted to be with me. That I was the most special thing to him, in his whole life. I’ve never been the most special thing in anyone’s life.
    But her I am sitting in my warm room, face down in the carpet, contemplating whether I love some guy who I just meet.
    Whether I love a guy who has been dating a girl for 3 years and 9 months, and “still gets butterflies in his stomach every time he sees her.”Oh yeah he loves that girl.
    “How AM I supposed to pretend I never want to see you again,” Ezra sings. One man I know I love. That Ezra, can always count on him.
    I replay the course of the day in my head. I hear the cold wind whooshing in my ears and the cars honking impatiently in the parking lots. Breaks squeaking, babies crying, the man sitting on the bench talking to himself. I hear all the sounds, but there is one that stands out more than the rest.
    His voice. His, melding into something beyond words. His words becoming music. Music, something I can, if not understand, appreciate, and love. The word is filled with meaningless chatter, but true music, unlike your Soldier Boys and Lil Waynes, is something far beyond. Something beautiful, something connecting. Sorry, Paul and Ezra, I love him.